Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Last blog
The Women that Inspire Me Throughout my course in English 217, I have read an intense amount of reading material that existed around powerful, passionate, and tragic women that have proven through writing and exposing their secrets for the world to bear. This is for them. I have read so many books this semester that it’s hard for me to pinpoint specific writers who have truly changed my thought and made me realize I should embrace the person who I am. I think that three writers who have really done that for me are Sapphire (author of Push), Dorothy Allison (author of Two or Three Things I Know for Sure,) and Eve Ensler (author of I’m an Emotional Creature.) All have inspired me as a woman, and have taught me to embrace the person I am and my thoughts/ feelings, yet in different ways. I’ll start with Sapphire, author of Push. This book was so disturbing yet beautiful, and tells the tale of an extremely obese young black woman who was raped by her father, delivered his two children, and lives with a mother that verbally and physically abuses her. Precious, her name, is also illiterate and starts a special school program with other girls to learn how to read and write. Throughout the book, I could never imagine going through what Precious had to go through. One specific part is when Precious is discussing her improved TABE test grade for reading and writing. Sapphire writes on page 139, “I know I can do this. I still got time.” Despite everything that has happened to her, she continues to keep on pushing, like the book title, and continues to improve her life and be a better example of a mother to her two children than her own mother was, something I find incredibly inspiring, especially at her age of sixteen. That shows true courage to me. Another example is Dorothy Allison, author of Two or Three Things I Know for Sure. While her story is slightly different, she grew up with men who physically and mentally abused their women, often making them feel ugly and worthless in the South. Allison grew up with an abusive stepfather and became a lesbian in her later years. On one specific page, Allison writes on page 70 that “I am the only one who can tell the story of my life and say what it means… I did not want to wear that coat, to be told what it meant, to be told how it had changed the flesh, to let myself be made over into my rapist’s creation. Two or Three things I know for sure… I would rather go naked than wear he coat the world has made for me.” Those are pretty powerful words! Based on this statement, despite all the hurtful words and feelings of worthlessness that Allison endured (her male family members calling her ugly or a bitch or abusing her) she finally says, “Enough!” This had such an impact on me particularly because I often feel I do things or worry about matters in terms of pleasing others. By reading this, it taught me to not. It taught me to be proud of who I am and to embrace the world full on… as well as myself by not trying to be anyone else. My last example is Eve Ensler’s I’m an Emotional Creature. In the introduction, it says “It’s a call for us to join girl’s resistance to turning their backs on one another and themselves… a story about manhood and womanhood that belies in the fact that, as humans, we are ALL emotional creatures.” This speaks to me, because Ensler particularly makes it okay for woman to have a voice, something still forgotten in today’s society. Through Ensler, possibilities are endless for women, and women do have a voice, making men and women alike in the sense we are all vulnerable, powerful, thoughtful people. These women inspired me and made me realize despite who I am as a woman, I can do anything. And I can change the world perhaps one day through exposing my thoughts and feelings, despite the outlet. I think that is a huge part as to what the writers in this class were stating.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Beauty CAN be Important!
A wise woman by the name of Marilyn Monroe once said that "it is important that all little girls be told they are pretty, even if they are not." I do agree with this statement. After all, how else is a girl supposed to build self-esteem into her adulthood? Dorothy Allison growing up never heard this statement. In her "neck of the woods," it was unlikely any young girl, particularly in the Allison clan, was seen as beautiful. I do think that beauty can be something important; it helps to build confidence in one self as well as to establish a sense of self-worth! But how can one do so when they are taught to be worth nothing?
Dorothy Allison explains on page 32 that "I have never allowed to be beautiful and female. I was born trash in a land where all the people all believe themselves natural aristocrats." While they may not be aristocrats, I do feel it's important to be told when is beautiful and worth something. In class, we questioned as to why Allison refers to herself as "trash" so openly. I think she does this because she is raised to belief based on her background and how the men in her family treated the women, that she, naturally is no different and is also inbred of trash. I feel that Allison might not be allowed to be beautiful because the males do not allow her to be. She shows examples of this, such as when her grandfather calls her grandmother an "ugly old woman," or when her uncles say it to her aunts. Other examples on page 36 are when her cousins say it to their sisters, and Allison's sisters said to her.
It is a whole addicting line of hurtful words and wounds being passed on through generation through generation, starting with the men, who perhaps feel differently of women in the country. Because Allison grows up hearing these statements, she feels that she could never be beautiful, which is why her aunt says to her on page 34, "Thank God your're smart." Her aunt also grew up to believe she was worthless and not beautiful, which essentially made Allison think she needed to search for other means of life.
It is important to feel beautiful, or even to find a sense of self-worth. I feel that if Allison was not raised this way, she would have had a better sense of self-esteem for this.
Dorothy Allison explains on page 32 that "I have never allowed to be beautiful and female. I was born trash in a land where all the people all believe themselves natural aristocrats." While they may not be aristocrats, I do feel it's important to be told when is beautiful and worth something. In class, we questioned as to why Allison refers to herself as "trash" so openly. I think she does this because she is raised to belief based on her background and how the men in her family treated the women, that she, naturally is no different and is also inbred of trash. I feel that Allison might not be allowed to be beautiful because the males do not allow her to be. She shows examples of this, such as when her grandfather calls her grandmother an "ugly old woman," or when her uncles say it to her aunts. Other examples on page 36 are when her cousins say it to their sisters, and Allison's sisters said to her.
It is a whole addicting line of hurtful words and wounds being passed on through generation through generation, starting with the men, who perhaps feel differently of women in the country. Because Allison grows up hearing these statements, she feels that she could never be beautiful, which is why her aunt says to her on page 34, "Thank God your're smart." Her aunt also grew up to believe she was worthless and not beautiful, which essentially made Allison think she needed to search for other means of life.
It is important to feel beautiful, or even to find a sense of self-worth. I feel that if Allison was not raised this way, she would have had a better sense of self-esteem for this.
Two or Three Things I Know for Sure
The book Two or Three Things I Know for Sure by Dorothy Allison is the best book I have read all semester. The reason I enjoy this book so much is because of how easy I can relate to it. Allison touches upon so many depressing, deep, and passionate "stories" from her family growing up in Greenville, South Carolina, such as abuse, lack of beauty, and the power men seem to possess in this part of the US. In one specific chapter, Allison talks about a very strong woman in her life, her mother, and in this story is an underlying example of how women 'really take care of all and run the world.
"At first I didn't understand what my sister was doing, but at the funeral home I began to understand. Wanda was being Mama, doing what Mama would have done, comforting us in the way only Mama knew how to do. Of all the things I imagined, this was the one I had not foreseen. We had become Mama." (Allison 16-17.)
After reading this, I felt very spooked out. While up until this point the book was just something else to read in an enjoyable manner, I realized something. Women from generation to generation pass down their habits and knowledge of taking care of others, so to speak, a main duty women have had for years. It also scared me because I am in that exact situation.
Recently, my grandmother, the only one I had left, unexpectedly passed away from a multiple of diseases. My mom and I moved a month before her passing to Weston, CT to live with family. We now currently live with my elderly grandfather, taking care of him because he too, was recently allowed to leave from the hospital.
Reading this part of the book made me realize that my mother is a firm representation of Allison's sister, Wanda. My mother is her mother, is "Mama," doing things that her mother did for her father and family. She takes care of my grandfather, physically, mentally, and financially as well as taking care of myself. She has become her mother, and because of how my grandmother was raised, my mother learned abilities to nurture others, something women are expected to do. Through this quote and my personal experience, it shows that women are expected to nurture all in any way possible back to health and they keep the world going.
"At first I didn't understand what my sister was doing, but at the funeral home I began to understand. Wanda was being Mama, doing what Mama would have done, comforting us in the way only Mama knew how to do. Of all the things I imagined, this was the one I had not foreseen. We had become Mama." (Allison 16-17.)
After reading this, I felt very spooked out. While up until this point the book was just something else to read in an enjoyable manner, I realized something. Women from generation to generation pass down their habits and knowledge of taking care of others, so to speak, a main duty women have had for years. It also scared me because I am in that exact situation.
Recently, my grandmother, the only one I had left, unexpectedly passed away from a multiple of diseases. My mom and I moved a month before her passing to Weston, CT to live with family. We now currently live with my elderly grandfather, taking care of him because he too, was recently allowed to leave from the hospital.
Reading this part of the book made me realize that my mother is a firm representation of Allison's sister, Wanda. My mother is her mother, is "Mama," doing things that her mother did for her father and family. She takes care of my grandfather, physically, mentally, and financially as well as taking care of myself. She has become her mother, and because of how my grandmother was raised, my mother learned abilities to nurture others, something women are expected to do. Through this quote and my personal experience, it shows that women are expected to nurture all in any way possible back to health and they keep the world going.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Symbolism in The Shawl
As in every book, there is always an underlying meaning in something. Something I found interesting was the manner in which Rosa Lublin, the main character in Cynthia Ozick's The Shawl writes to her daughter who was brutally murdered, Magda. Rosa writes to her as if Magda is all grown up, perhaps she lives somewhere of a distance from her mother. I often have thought as to why she does this. Perhaps it is coming from a mother's perspective and she had high aspirations for her daughter to be something, despite the fact she did not have a chance? Or perhaps Rosa really is crazy and believes her daughter is alive. Perhaps Rosa knows that Magda is alive in spirit and associates her body literally with that of spirit.
An example of Rosa's unusual writing style to her daughter is on page 39. Ozick writes, " Forgive me, my yellow lioness. Too long a time since the last writing. " My thoughts are on this statement that maybe Rosa "writes" to her daughter as a way to cope with the remembrance of the loss of Magda. She address her with the oddest names, such as "lioness." Rosa really idolizes her daughter and thinks the world of her. Rosa then goes on discussing the type of life she had growing up and how her parents were. I think she does this because she never had her child to actually get to talk about her life growing up. As ironic as it is, both of her parents were into stories in a different sense, which is an obvious reason to why Rosa has no problems concocting one. From what Ozick writes, her father was a specialist in "foreign texts and periodicals." Her mother "published poetry." Something I find unique is how Ozick then writes, "To you all these accounts must have the ring of pure legend, even Stella, who CAN remember, refuses" on page 41. These people obviously have the gene of story-telling in them, so why is it any different that Rosa can make up a life for her daughter and writes to her as if she is real? It is true she lost her baby girl, but she is not alive in the way Rosa makes her to be. I think that Rosa wants so badly to believe that Madga is still alive, that Rosa did not fail as a mother and did not let her daughter die but that she saved her and they grew up together. Perhaps Rosa is not writing to her daughter... but her daughter as an angel.
An example of Rosa's unusual writing style to her daughter is on page 39. Ozick writes, " Forgive me, my yellow lioness. Too long a time since the last writing. " My thoughts are on this statement that maybe Rosa "writes" to her daughter as a way to cope with the remembrance of the loss of Magda. She address her with the oddest names, such as "lioness." Rosa really idolizes her daughter and thinks the world of her. Rosa then goes on discussing the type of life she had growing up and how her parents were. I think she does this because she never had her child to actually get to talk about her life growing up. As ironic as it is, both of her parents were into stories in a different sense, which is an obvious reason to why Rosa has no problems concocting one. From what Ozick writes, her father was a specialist in "foreign texts and periodicals." Her mother "published poetry." Something I find unique is how Ozick then writes, "To you all these accounts must have the ring of pure legend, even Stella, who CAN remember, refuses" on page 41. These people obviously have the gene of story-telling in them, so why is it any different that Rosa can make up a life for her daughter and writes to her as if she is real? It is true she lost her baby girl, but she is not alive in the way Rosa makes her to be. I think that Rosa wants so badly to believe that Madga is still alive, that Rosa did not fail as a mother and did not let her daughter die but that she saved her and they grew up together. Perhaps Rosa is not writing to her daughter... but her daughter as an angel.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Why are People so Cruel?
Something I found ironically funny is the way the main character in the book The Shawl by Cynthia Ozick, who is crazy in the book, finds her niece, Stella, to be so cruel. What makes a person cruel? I know everyone has different opinions, but is how Stella treating her aunt considered to be cruel or is she simply giving her elderly aunt tough love?
Throughout Rosa Lublin, the main character's, time in the concentration camps in Poland, she also took care of her 14 year old niece, Stella. From the very beginning, Ozick writes, "Stella, cold, cold, the coldness of hell." This opening line unveils a sense of intrigue to the reader and after careful analysis, I realize this was Rosa's way of looking back to describe her cold and selfish niece who wanted to be cared for at a time when she was split by both her parents and was in the care of an older aunt with a secret child of her own. I partially think for Stella being so young it was hard for her to handle the loss of her parents and her sanctity. As Ozick mentions on page 6, "And afterward she was always cold, always. The cold went into her heart."
Later on, there are other forms of Stella being cruel. This is an excerpt from a letter from Stella to her aunt on page 31. Ozick writes, "You make yourself crazy, everyone thinks you're a crazy woman. You'll open the box and take it out and cry, and you'll kiss it like a crazy person. Rosa, it's time you have a life." This is upon her returning the shawl from Rosa's dead baby to her. This is cruel, in my opinion. But maybe there is a reason for Stella's unusually hostile behavior. Perhaps she wished her aunt took better care and paid more attention to her as a growing girl during those tormenting years. She never had her parents. Maybe Stella is hostile towards her aunt for harboring a loss that was not really her fault. I think deep down she wants her aunt to move on, yet she (Rosa) takes Stella being cruel and working against the loss of her child.
A lot of readers can view this as cruel, but part of me sees it as a natural reaction as the result of fear, depression, and neglect.
Throughout Rosa Lublin, the main character's, time in the concentration camps in Poland, she also took care of her 14 year old niece, Stella. From the very beginning, Ozick writes, "Stella, cold, cold, the coldness of hell." This opening line unveils a sense of intrigue to the reader and after careful analysis, I realize this was Rosa's way of looking back to describe her cold and selfish niece who wanted to be cared for at a time when she was split by both her parents and was in the care of an older aunt with a secret child of her own. I partially think for Stella being so young it was hard for her to handle the loss of her parents and her sanctity. As Ozick mentions on page 6, "And afterward she was always cold, always. The cold went into her heart."
Later on, there are other forms of Stella being cruel. This is an excerpt from a letter from Stella to her aunt on page 31. Ozick writes, "You make yourself crazy, everyone thinks you're a crazy woman. You'll open the box and take it out and cry, and you'll kiss it like a crazy person. Rosa, it's time you have a life." This is upon her returning the shawl from Rosa's dead baby to her. This is cruel, in my opinion. But maybe there is a reason for Stella's unusually hostile behavior. Perhaps she wished her aunt took better care and paid more attention to her as a growing girl during those tormenting years. She never had her parents. Maybe Stella is hostile towards her aunt for harboring a loss that was not really her fault. I think deep down she wants her aunt to move on, yet she (Rosa) takes Stella being cruel and working against the loss of her child.
A lot of readers can view this as cruel, but part of me sees it as a natural reaction as the result of fear, depression, and neglect.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Symbolism in "The Shawl"
After careful thinking and analysis, I realized the critics of The Shawl by Cynthis Ozick were correct. Critics have used the item of the shawl to connect with the main character, Rosa Lublin, a concentration camp survivor during the Holocaust. Critics have stated that the object of the shawl "can sustain a starving child or inadvertently destroy her, or magically conjure her back to life." I do realize this is true.
In the beginning of the book, Rosa had a baby girl named Magda. She would keep her baby swaddled in a cloth, or shawl in order to protect the child against members finding out about her child with I am assuming what is known as an "Aryan." On page 5, Ozick starts to describe the shawl, saying that "it was a magic shawl; it could nourish an infant for three days and three nights." For this metaphor the author makes the shawl to be a needing factor in the child's life. For this shawl, baby Magda can be buried warmly and peacefully, sucking on her mother's breast for comfort and nourishment. It is also the ironic reason that for the lack of the shawl Rosa's daughter died during this time period. On page 8, Ozick describes a scene where I am assuming that Magda is a little bit older and does not need her shawl anymore. Ozick writes, "Maaaa...a! Rosa saw that Magda was grieving for the loss of her shawl, she saw she was going to die." Because of her having the shawl taken away from her, guards found little Magda and she was killed against an electrified fence they threw her against.
Later on in the book, Magda's shawl reappears, showing the true symbolism and a connection so strong between mother and daughter. On page 31, Rosa is much older now and has finally received the shawl she asked her neice to send to her. Ozick describes the meaning of the shawl: "The holy fragrance of the lost babe .Murdered. She put the shawl to her lips. Magda's swaddling cloth." To Rosa, the shawl is the only item she has left to connect her relationship to her dead daughter. Of COURSE she would cherish it! For this reason symbolizes and brings together the importance of an inanimate object in this book, to instill memory, sadness, yet hope in its characters.
In the beginning of the book, Rosa had a baby girl named Magda. She would keep her baby swaddled in a cloth, or shawl in order to protect the child against members finding out about her child with I am assuming what is known as an "Aryan." On page 5, Ozick starts to describe the shawl, saying that "it was a magic shawl; it could nourish an infant for three days and three nights." For this metaphor the author makes the shawl to be a needing factor in the child's life. For this shawl, baby Magda can be buried warmly and peacefully, sucking on her mother's breast for comfort and nourishment. It is also the ironic reason that for the lack of the shawl Rosa's daughter died during this time period. On page 8, Ozick describes a scene where I am assuming that Magda is a little bit older and does not need her shawl anymore. Ozick writes, "Maaaa...a! Rosa saw that Magda was grieving for the loss of her shawl, she saw she was going to die." Because of her having the shawl taken away from her, guards found little Magda and she was killed against an electrified fence they threw her against.
Later on in the book, Magda's shawl reappears, showing the true symbolism and a connection so strong between mother and daughter. On page 31, Rosa is much older now and has finally received the shawl she asked her neice to send to her. Ozick describes the meaning of the shawl: "The holy fragrance of the lost babe .Murdered. She put the shawl to her lips. Magda's swaddling cloth." To Rosa, the shawl is the only item she has left to connect her relationship to her dead daughter. Of COURSE she would cherish it! For this reason symbolizes and brings together the importance of an inanimate object in this book, to instill memory, sadness, yet hope in its characters.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Everything can Change in the Blink of an Eye...
The expression how things are constantly changing and in rapid motion is very true. In the story When the Emperor was Divine By Julie Otsuka there is a significant change in the ending. The story centers around a Japanese-American family after Pearl Harbor. The father was arrested and is in constant communication with his family. He is always chipper, upbeat, and strong for his family. Perhaps he is lying, but I think that he wants to remain in a positive attitude so his family can stay strong and stay in high spirits that he will be coming home. For example, on page 42, Otsuka writes from the father's perspective, "I am in good health and hope you are all well. Be good to your mother." I'm certain he did have hardships in prison, but he made sure his family kept his memories alive in a positive manner and that the father ensured all was taken care of. When he comes home, it is different.
He finally returns after a three year's absence. Otsuka writes on page 132, "All we could do was stare down at our shoes. Because the man who stood in front of us was not our father. That's not him. We could not be sure it was him." When this was stated, I thought at first by the text that another man came in his place to state that the father had died. Because of what he has gone through, there is a significant change. Otsuka lists the changes on page 132. "The father we remembered... handsome and strong. He liked to draw .. sing... laugh. The man... looked much older than his fifty-six years. He did not draw for us, read us stories..." She directly states the differences. It shows how unfortunate change is. Because of what their father went through, he came back with a distressed look that made him look older. The dad also came back a changed man because of his experiences, which are unknown. That time away was probably cruel, long, and lonely for him, making him better and learning to trust no one, something his children may not understand right away. This is way change can be difficult, especially when one knows a person to be loving.
He finally returns after a three year's absence. Otsuka writes on page 132, "All we could do was stare down at our shoes. Because the man who stood in front of us was not our father. That's not him. We could not be sure it was him." When this was stated, I thought at first by the text that another man came in his place to state that the father had died. Because of what he has gone through, there is a significant change. Otsuka lists the changes on page 132. "The father we remembered... handsome and strong. He liked to draw .. sing... laugh. The man... looked much older than his fifty-six years. He did not draw for us, read us stories..." She directly states the differences. It shows how unfortunate change is. Because of what their father went through, he came back with a distressed look that made him look older. The dad also came back a changed man because of his experiences, which are unknown. That time away was probably cruel, long, and lonely for him, making him better and learning to trust no one, something his children may not understand right away. This is way change can be difficult, especially when one knows a person to be loving.
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Does lying really make everything better?
Throughout the novel When the Emperor was Divine by Julie Otsuka, a reoccurring prevalence is the subject of lying. I can understand how lying can sometimes make a situation look significantly better than it really is, but what is the point of it can not improve anything?
There are several different instances where the Japanese-American family the novel is centered around using lying as a mechanism to display the irony of a situation well. I think people often feel by lying to themselves, instilling hope and optimism it makes one feel mentally better. For example, on page 29, the family is on their way to an internment camp where the Japs were sent shortly after Pearl Harbor. The young daughter's little brother says to her according to Otsuka, "Do you think we'll see horses?" "I don't know," said the girl. She remembers reading here about wild horses. The paragraph then says, "If a cowboy needed a new horse, all he had to do was go out into the desert and get himself one. So she told the boy that they probably would." On page 30, the boy asks, "How many do you think we'll see?" "Quite possibly, eight." Why lie about something as trivial as horses? In this book, the wild horses represent freedom, something the family won't have for another three years. The boy grew up with horses and being in the horse stalls, so for him to ask that instills a sense of normalcy and familiarity in him. By his sister lying to him and reassuring him that horses will be seen allows that innocence to remain for the boy. It gives him something to look forward to on their little "adventure."
Another form of lying is on page 42. The family receives a note from their father. The note says, "I am in good health and hope you all are well." Now, I highly doubt that the father was not tortured or stricken down when he was taken in and arrested. Being the man of the family, the father of course wants to reassure his family he is okay because he does not want them to worry about him. The lie also becomes evident at the end of the story when the family describes the event of their father finally arriving home. Because of his appearance and his evident change in demeanor ,on page 132, Otsuka writes, "He was somebody else, a stranger who had been sent back in our father's place. That's not him, that's not him. He uttered our names, but still we could not be sure it was him." The reader is aware of the changes that will occur, yet the children are not. This shows that lying is a form of this horrible story and through lying in an optimistic manner, maybe this is what instilled hope in the family and kept them going.
There are several different instances where the Japanese-American family the novel is centered around using lying as a mechanism to display the irony of a situation well. I think people often feel by lying to themselves, instilling hope and optimism it makes one feel mentally better. For example, on page 29, the family is on their way to an internment camp where the Japs were sent shortly after Pearl Harbor. The young daughter's little brother says to her according to Otsuka, "Do you think we'll see horses?" "I don't know," said the girl. She remembers reading here about wild horses. The paragraph then says, "If a cowboy needed a new horse, all he had to do was go out into the desert and get himself one. So she told the boy that they probably would." On page 30, the boy asks, "How many do you think we'll see?" "Quite possibly, eight." Why lie about something as trivial as horses? In this book, the wild horses represent freedom, something the family won't have for another three years. The boy grew up with horses and being in the horse stalls, so for him to ask that instills a sense of normalcy and familiarity in him. By his sister lying to him and reassuring him that horses will be seen allows that innocence to remain for the boy. It gives him something to look forward to on their little "adventure."
Another form of lying is on page 42. The family receives a note from their father. The note says, "I am in good health and hope you all are well." Now, I highly doubt that the father was not tortured or stricken down when he was taken in and arrested. Being the man of the family, the father of course wants to reassure his family he is okay because he does not want them to worry about him. The lie also becomes evident at the end of the story when the family describes the event of their father finally arriving home. Because of his appearance and his evident change in demeanor ,on page 132, Otsuka writes, "He was somebody else, a stranger who had been sent back in our father's place. That's not him, that's not him. He uttered our names, but still we could not be sure it was him." The reader is aware of the changes that will occur, yet the children are not. This shows that lying is a form of this horrible story and through lying in an optimistic manner, maybe this is what instilled hope in the family and kept them going.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
A Helpful Hand or Downright Cruel?
In the book When the Emperor was Divine by Julie Otsuka, it touches on life for the Japanese, particularly Japanese-Americans and how they were treated after Pearl Harbor. Something that stuck out to me in class was the discussion of helping others , or so it perceives to be that way...
In the beginning of the book, the story focuses around a Jap-American mother preparing for her big move to the internment camps in Utah with her family. In one part, she stops into the local California hardware store, Lund's Hardware. The next part is based on interpretation.Otsuka writes on page 5, "You can pay me later. I can pay you now. "Dont worry about it. For the children." The conversation is between the owner, Joe Lundy, and the mother. What he gave to her was peices of caramel to take home to her children. Now some may think that's mean. Why is he patronizing her? Shouldn't he mention her unfortunate move as well as her husband's arrest based on his origin? Why is he pretending nothing is going on?
I think thats just it, though. While Lundy fails to address the serious matter at hand, he is capable of showing emotion, despite being 100% American. I think the reason she gives the mom the caramels is because Lundy feels bad because of the unfortunate events that are happening to her and her family. It's obvious he knows what's going on, yet to make her feel a little better, perhaps even to give the kids something to remember their idealized home life by, he gives her caramels to bring them. I do not feel it was patronizing, I feel people cope with different scenarios with different usage of emotions. Perhaps Lundy was afraid to mention the events to precede for fear of what could happen to HIM? Maybe he genuinely does not know what to say and feels terrible, another reason for being nice. I don't feel he was personally trying to hurt her. I was thinking that he was trying to make the mom feel better and more "Americanized" by trying to give her kids a gift. She shows her graciousness by on page 6: "Thank you, thank you, Joe. The words sounds wrong, almost. She wished she had said it earlier." The simple act of kindness gave her power to return the personal favor by addressing him by first name. I think that just because he did not necessarily bring up the matter to her and apologize, maybe he was trying to make light of the situation and help out. What do you think, readers?
In the beginning of the book, the story focuses around a Jap-American mother preparing for her big move to the internment camps in Utah with her family. In one part, she stops into the local California hardware store, Lund's Hardware. The next part is based on interpretation.Otsuka writes on page 5, "You can pay me later. I can pay you now. "Dont worry about it. For the children." The conversation is between the owner, Joe Lundy, and the mother. What he gave to her was peices of caramel to take home to her children. Now some may think that's mean. Why is he patronizing her? Shouldn't he mention her unfortunate move as well as her husband's arrest based on his origin? Why is he pretending nothing is going on?
I think thats just it, though. While Lundy fails to address the serious matter at hand, he is capable of showing emotion, despite being 100% American. I think the reason she gives the mom the caramels is because Lundy feels bad because of the unfortunate events that are happening to her and her family. It's obvious he knows what's going on, yet to make her feel a little better, perhaps even to give the kids something to remember their idealized home life by, he gives her caramels to bring them. I do not feel it was patronizing, I feel people cope with different scenarios with different usage of emotions. Perhaps Lundy was afraid to mention the events to precede for fear of what could happen to HIM? Maybe he genuinely does not know what to say and feels terrible, another reason for being nice. I don't feel he was personally trying to hurt her. I was thinking that he was trying to make the mom feel better and more "Americanized" by trying to give her kids a gift. She shows her graciousness by on page 6: "Thank you, thank you, Joe. The words sounds wrong, almost. She wished she had said it earlier." The simple act of kindness gave her power to return the personal favor by addressing him by first name. I think that just because he did not necessarily bring up the matter to her and apologize, maybe he was trying to make light of the situation and help out. What do you think, readers?
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Dreaming is Believing
Something about the novel Push by Sapphire is very personal, maybe because how highly and deeply it discusses the protagonist, Precious Jones, dreams for herself. I truly feel this specific novel shows that dreaming is believing, and if you believe, you can get anything in life.
The book really shows the phenomenal transformation of the character, Precious from an illiterate, no-good 16 year old to a mature young woman, who feels so deeply and can voice her words in such a dee and beautiful way on paper.
In the beginning, the test Precious took to test her reading she only scored a 2.0, which is VERY low for reading. On page 139, Sapphire describes Precious' "Quantum leap." " I took the TABE test again, this time it's 7.8. Ms. Rain say quantum leap! I read according to the test around 7th or 8th grade level now! I got to get up to the level of high school kids, then college kids. I know I can do this. Ms. Rain tell me it's gunna work out, don't worry. I still got time." This shows how far an illiterate girl has come, and by her telling herself she can succeed and having the utmost confidence in herself shows her leap in her schoolwork, but herself, especially considering Precious living with a mother who constantly degrades her, beats her and accuses her of stealing her "husband." To me, the book is inspirational, particularly with that quote from Precious because it shows regardless of who a person is, if they persevere and "push," they can be someone. Precious also reveals dreams for herself, making her more real and instilling hope in the reader. On page 138, Sapphire discusses Precious' worries on her HIV. " My heart fill. Hurt. One year? Five ?Ten? Maybe more if I take care of myself. Maybe a cure. Who knows, who is working on shit like that?" This shows her dreams, and also made me predict what would happen to Precious, especially if she started being healthier. Would she ever fulfill her dreams of being successful by getting a job, apartment, and raising BOTH her kids? Who knows? What I truly love about the novel is that it proves that no matter who you are, if you "push" yourself, you gunna get somewhere!
The book really shows the phenomenal transformation of the character, Precious from an illiterate, no-good 16 year old to a mature young woman, who feels so deeply and can voice her words in such a dee and beautiful way on paper.
In the beginning, the test Precious took to test her reading she only scored a 2.0, which is VERY low for reading. On page 139, Sapphire describes Precious' "Quantum leap." " I took the TABE test again, this time it's 7.8. Ms. Rain say quantum leap! I read according to the test around 7th or 8th grade level now! I got to get up to the level of high school kids, then college kids. I know I can do this. Ms. Rain tell me it's gunna work out, don't worry. I still got time." This shows how far an illiterate girl has come, and by her telling herself she can succeed and having the utmost confidence in herself shows her leap in her schoolwork, but herself, especially considering Precious living with a mother who constantly degrades her, beats her and accuses her of stealing her "husband." To me, the book is inspirational, particularly with that quote from Precious because it shows regardless of who a person is, if they persevere and "push," they can be someone. Precious also reveals dreams for herself, making her more real and instilling hope in the reader. On page 138, Sapphire discusses Precious' worries on her HIV. " My heart fill. Hurt. One year? Five ?Ten? Maybe more if I take care of myself. Maybe a cure. Who knows, who is working on shit like that?" This shows her dreams, and also made me predict what would happen to Precious, especially if she started being healthier. Would she ever fulfill her dreams of being successful by getting a job, apartment, and raising BOTH her kids? Who knows? What I truly love about the novel is that it proves that no matter who you are, if you "push" yourself, you gunna get somewhere!
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Who makes the change?
In class this week, we were to answer a question. What/who helps Precious to make the change for her to better herself? Based on our discussion, while I do think there are people that influenced you to make the change, you as your own person have to also want to make the change.
In order to begin, the book Precious by Sapphire focuses around a young 16 year old girl, growing up in Harlem illiterate and overweight with a mother who verballs/mentally abuses her and a HIV-positive father who rapes her and she has birthed two children by. The reader may think that it is hopeless for Precious, that with a life like that, how could things get better? I find it admirable that Precious wants to make the change and become a better person, especially to help support her two children, but I do feel that her teacher, Ms. Rain, definitely helps Precious to make the change and pushes her to do better. One example of how Ms. Rain is an influence on her is on page 55. She is trying to encourage Precious to sound out words and learn how to read. It's obvious to the reader that it is a new feeling for Precious to receive this kind of encouragement. Sapphire writes," She make me feel good. I never readed nuffin' before." Because of this encouragement Precious received, it inspired her to do better and persevere. Another example of Ms. Rain helping Precious to work harder is on page 70. In a journal entry to Precious, Sapphire writes from the teacher's perspective, "You are learning to read and write; that is everything." This inspiring statement pushes Precious to work harder and of course, she perserves thanks to the help of her teacher, the only positive influence in her life. On page 71, Ms. Rain says, "You are a wonderful woman who is trying to make something of her life." Again, this gives Precious a reason to work harder to make a life for herself and her kids. There is proof that Ms.Rain's influence pays off. On page 75, Sapphire writes, "I not going to school 'm I not going to give Abdul up and I is gonna get Little Mongo back one day, maybe." Despite everything that Precious has gone through, she is mature enough to realize she is a mother and does not want her kids growing up with the life she had. So she is pushes herself and doesn't give up easily in order to make herself a better woman and support her family. If it wasn't for ms. Rain, Precious might be a different person.
In order to begin, the book Precious by Sapphire focuses around a young 16 year old girl, growing up in Harlem illiterate and overweight with a mother who verballs/mentally abuses her and a HIV-positive father who rapes her and she has birthed two children by. The reader may think that it is hopeless for Precious, that with a life like that, how could things get better? I find it admirable that Precious wants to make the change and become a better person, especially to help support her two children, but I do feel that her teacher, Ms. Rain, definitely helps Precious to make the change and pushes her to do better. One example of how Ms. Rain is an influence on her is on page 55. She is trying to encourage Precious to sound out words and learn how to read. It's obvious to the reader that it is a new feeling for Precious to receive this kind of encouragement. Sapphire writes," She make me feel good. I never readed nuffin' before." Because of this encouragement Precious received, it inspired her to do better and persevere. Another example of Ms. Rain helping Precious to work harder is on page 70. In a journal entry to Precious, Sapphire writes from the teacher's perspective, "You are learning to read and write; that is everything." This inspiring statement pushes Precious to work harder and of course, she perserves thanks to the help of her teacher, the only positive influence in her life. On page 71, Ms. Rain says, "You are a wonderful woman who is trying to make something of her life." Again, this gives Precious a reason to work harder to make a life for herself and her kids. There is proof that Ms.Rain's influence pays off. On page 75, Sapphire writes, "I not going to school 'm I not going to give Abdul up and I is gonna get Little Mongo back one day, maybe." Despite everything that Precious has gone through, she is mature enough to realize she is a mother and does not want her kids growing up with the life she had. So she is pushes herself and doesn't give up easily in order to make herself a better woman and support her family. If it wasn't for ms. Rain, Precious might be a different person.
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Relationships
What I've noticed is that everyone has a different relationship with their parents, particularly Allison Bechdel's relationship with her father, Bruce. Their relationship is so different, estranged... yet similar and close.
Throughout the book, the two get into numerous arguments, mostly based on their differences. She has a need to be a tomboy, while he needs to express his femininity throughout his daughter seeing he can not in today's society.
On page 197, Bechdel writes, " His arrival home from work cast a cold pall on the peaceable kingdom where mom, Christian and I spent our days." This to me, shows a sense that the two were never close. Her father seems closed off to me, maybe trying to conceal his secret of his being gay. The two were constantly at war with each other, each trying to make each other be something they were not (for example, when Bechdel's father pushes her to wear the girliest dress possible.) Ironically enough, there is a bond that forms between a common love for both parties: literature. Bechdel explains how she was in her father's English class and because it was drilled in her, she knew all about the work. She says on page 199, "Sometimes it was as if only my Dad and I were the only ones in the room. I think we were both starved for attention." While this is very deep, it states that both share a secret, both go unnoticed and no one ever really figures out what they hide. The two are connected in that way. There is also a portion I always revert back to, where the two (in an unspoken way) admit to wanting to be the opposite genders... something uncommon for daughter and father to share. The two have an unspoken bond, and their homosexuality connects them. Both are hidden, both are dying to be someone else... maybe that was why the two clashed because each was trying to be accepted into society for what they truly weren't. That moment of realization in the car really signified their bond, by showing one intimate moment between the two. It really makes a person wonder about relationships...
Throughout the book, the two get into numerous arguments, mostly based on their differences. She has a need to be a tomboy, while he needs to express his femininity throughout his daughter seeing he can not in today's society.
On page 197, Bechdel writes, " His arrival home from work cast a cold pall on the peaceable kingdom where mom, Christian and I spent our days." This to me, shows a sense that the two were never close. Her father seems closed off to me, maybe trying to conceal his secret of his being gay. The two were constantly at war with each other, each trying to make each other be something they were not (for example, when Bechdel's father pushes her to wear the girliest dress possible.) Ironically enough, there is a bond that forms between a common love for both parties: literature. Bechdel explains how she was in her father's English class and because it was drilled in her, she knew all about the work. She says on page 199, "Sometimes it was as if only my Dad and I were the only ones in the room. I think we were both starved for attention." While this is very deep, it states that both share a secret, both go unnoticed and no one ever really figures out what they hide. The two are connected in that way. There is also a portion I always revert back to, where the two (in an unspoken way) admit to wanting to be the opposite genders... something uncommon for daughter and father to share. The two have an unspoken bond, and their homosexuality connects them. Both are hidden, both are dying to be someone else... maybe that was why the two clashed because each was trying to be accepted into society for what they truly weren't. That moment of realization in the car really signified their bond, by showing one intimate moment between the two. It really makes a person wonder about relationships...
Thursday, March 31, 2011
What Defines Something as Funny?
I notice that every person has their own definitions of what someone defines as funny. What I found funny was how Allison Bechdel in the novel Fun Home, found it funny that her father had passed.
On page 227, Bechdel brings up an interesting point. She writes, "They say grief takes many forms, including the absence of grief." On this page shows specific pictures of Bechdel at her summer job in the library, explaining to a co-worker about her father's passing. Because she is laughing, he does not believe her. She then asks him, "Why don't you believe me?" He then responds with, "Because you are laughing." As she further explains how her father died, she then goes into hysterics (laughing.) She then writes, "The idea that my vital, passionate father was decomposing in a grave was ridiculous."
It is here in that statement Bechdel shows somewhat a warmth for her father, saying how he was passionate, especially about literature and the English language. To her, it seems ridiculous the father she knew and somewhat loved was gone. Perhaps she was in denial and that is why she laughed. I realize everyone has their own ways of coping with death, myself included. I also laugh at death which masks my fear of it. Maybe Bechdel was in denial, like mentioned before, or was masking a fear of not having someone close to her as a family member who has a need to be accepted and masks their true self (sexuality.)
I think despite the troubles that Allison Bechdel had with her father they were similar in the sense that they hid their true selves. For example, they have a moment of truth and connecting when they are in the car on their way to the movies on page 221 and he admits to wanting to dress like a girl and she admits to wanting to be a boy! It is in this moment their secrets of their sexual orientation come out and they can admit who they are. This shows the remembrance and affection for her father. Especially so on the last page, when ironically enough she looks back on her father on page 232, and says "He was there to catch me when I leapt." All in all, maybe she could not believe he was gone, and defined her father's death as funny. But she'll always remember the unspoken bond they had.
On page 227, Bechdel brings up an interesting point. She writes, "They say grief takes many forms, including the absence of grief." On this page shows specific pictures of Bechdel at her summer job in the library, explaining to a co-worker about her father's passing. Because she is laughing, he does not believe her. She then asks him, "Why don't you believe me?" He then responds with, "Because you are laughing." As she further explains how her father died, she then goes into hysterics (laughing.) She then writes, "The idea that my vital, passionate father was decomposing in a grave was ridiculous."
It is here in that statement Bechdel shows somewhat a warmth for her father, saying how he was passionate, especially about literature and the English language. To her, it seems ridiculous the father she knew and somewhat loved was gone. Perhaps she was in denial and that is why she laughed. I realize everyone has their own ways of coping with death, myself included. I also laugh at death which masks my fear of it. Maybe Bechdel was in denial, like mentioned before, or was masking a fear of not having someone close to her as a family member who has a need to be accepted and masks their true self (sexuality.)
I think despite the troubles that Allison Bechdel had with her father they were similar in the sense that they hid their true selves. For example, they have a moment of truth and connecting when they are in the car on their way to the movies on page 221 and he admits to wanting to dress like a girl and she admits to wanting to be a boy! It is in this moment their secrets of their sexual orientation come out and they can admit who they are. This shows the remembrance and affection for her father. Especially so on the last page, when ironically enough she looks back on her father on page 232, and says "He was there to catch me when I leapt." All in all, maybe she could not believe he was gone, and defined her father's death as funny. But she'll always remember the unspoken bond they had.
What Defines Something as Funny?
I notice that every person has their own definitions of what someone defines as funny. What I found funny was how Allison Bechdel in the novel Fun Home, found it funny that her father had passed.
On page 227, Bechdel brings up an interesting point. She writes, "They say grief takes many forms, including the absence of grief." On this page shows specific pictures of Bechdel at her summer job in the library, explaining to a co-worker about her father's passing. Because she is laughing, he does not believe her. She then asks him, "Why don't you believe me?" He then responds with, "Because you are laughing." As she further explains how her father died, she then goes into hysterics (laughing.) She then writes, "The idea that my vital, passionate father was decomposing in a grave was ridiculous."
It is here in that statement Bechdel shows somewhat a warmth for her father, saying how he was passionate, especially about literature and the English language. To her, it seems ridiculous the father she knew and somewhat loved was gone. Perhaps she was in denial and that is why she laughed. I realize everyone has their own ways of coping with death, myself included. I also laugh at death which masks my fear of it. Maybe Bechdel was in denial, like mentioned before, or was masking a fear of not having someone close to her as a family member who has a need to be accepted and masks their true self (sexuality.)
I think despite the troubles that Allison Bechdel had with her father they were similar in the sense that they hid their true selves. For example, they have a moment of truth and connecting when they are in the car on their way to the movies on page 221 and he admits to wanting to dress like a girl and she admits to wanting to be a boy! It is in this moment their secrets of their sexual orientation come out and they can admit who they are. This shows the remembrance and affection for her father. Especially so on the last page, when ironically enough she looks back on her father on page 232, and says "He was there to catch me when I leapt." All in all, maybe she could not believe he was gone, and defined her father's death as funny. But she'll always remember the unspoken bond they had.
On page 227, Bechdel brings up an interesting point. She writes, "They say grief takes many forms, including the absence of grief." On this page shows specific pictures of Bechdel at her summer job in the library, explaining to a co-worker about her father's passing. Because she is laughing, he does not believe her. She then asks him, "Why don't you believe me?" He then responds with, "Because you are laughing." As she further explains how her father died, she then goes into hysterics (laughing.) She then writes, "The idea that my vital, passionate father was decomposing in a grave was ridiculous."
It is here in that statement Bechdel shows somewhat a warmth for her father, saying how he was passionate, especially about literature and the English language. To her, it seems ridiculous the father she knew and somewhat loved was gone. Perhaps she was in denial and that is why she laughed. I realize everyone has their own ways of coping with death, myself included. I also laugh at death which masks my fear of it. Maybe Bechdel was in denial, like mentioned before, or was masking a fear of not having someone close to her as a family member who has a need to be accepted and masks their true self (sexuality.)
I think despite the troubles that Allison Bechdel had with her father they were similar in the sense that they hid their true selves. For example, they have a moment of truth and connecting when they are in the car on their way to the movies on page 221 and he admits to wanting to dress like a girl and she admits to wanting to be a boy! It is in this moment their secrets of their sexual orientation come out and they can admit who they are. This shows the remembrance and affection for her father. Especially so on the last page, when ironically enough she looks back on her father on page 232, and says "He was there to catch me when I leapt." All in all, maybe she could not believe he was gone, and defined her father's death as funny. But she'll always remember the unspoken bond they had.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Works of literature and Lesbianism Correlation
I realized throughout reading Fun Home by Alison Bechdel there are a lot of relations to different topics. One that struck me as surprising was that of a fear of lesbianism.
I feel at certain points in the book, the main character portrayed by Bechdel discusses her path of being a lesbian. She relates literature herself and her father have read to characters, situations, and feelings that fictional and non fictional people have felt. For example, on page 214, there is a detailed photograph of Bechdel performing oral sex on her girlfriend, Joan, at the time in college. The quote that Bechdel uses says, "Like Odysseus on the island of the cyclops, I found myself facing a "being of colossal strength and ferocity, to whom the law of man and God meant nothing." " Here, she is discussing her facing an intimate factor of a relationship, something by her gender can convey her true sexual orientation and something new and scary.
The next image shows her about to conduct oral on Joan, and the quote Bechdel gives says, "In true heroic fashion, I moved toward the thing I feared, yet while Odysseus schemed desperately to escape Polyphemus's cave, I found that I was quite content to stay here forever." It is in this sense that Bechdel becomes comfortable with who she is and what she is doing.
I often wondered, how does this tie in with her father? From pages 220-221, Bechdel and her father are in the car and have a realization. They both state who they really are, their deepest secrets, dreams, and wishes to be someone else, fulling owning their sexual orientations. Bechdel writes, "It was not the sobbing, joyous reunion of Odysseus and Telemachus, it was more like fatherless Stephen and sonless Bloom having their equivocal late-night Cocoa at 7 Eccles Street." It shows their own union, a bond other members of the family did not have, and how the two very real people come together and see eye to eye on acceptance and embracing who they are, something done through the use of Bechdel's father's beloved literature.
I feel at certain points in the book, the main character portrayed by Bechdel discusses her path of being a lesbian. She relates literature herself and her father have read to characters, situations, and feelings that fictional and non fictional people have felt. For example, on page 214, there is a detailed photograph of Bechdel performing oral sex on her girlfriend, Joan, at the time in college. The quote that Bechdel uses says, "Like Odysseus on the island of the cyclops, I found myself facing a "being of colossal strength and ferocity, to whom the law of man and God meant nothing." " Here, she is discussing her facing an intimate factor of a relationship, something by her gender can convey her true sexual orientation and something new and scary.
The next image shows her about to conduct oral on Joan, and the quote Bechdel gives says, "In true heroic fashion, I moved toward the thing I feared, yet while Odysseus schemed desperately to escape Polyphemus's cave, I found that I was quite content to stay here forever." It is in this sense that Bechdel becomes comfortable with who she is and what she is doing.
I often wondered, how does this tie in with her father? From pages 220-221, Bechdel and her father are in the car and have a realization. They both state who they really are, their deepest secrets, dreams, and wishes to be someone else, fulling owning their sexual orientations. Bechdel writes, "It was not the sobbing, joyous reunion of Odysseus and Telemachus, it was more like fatherless Stephen and sonless Bloom having their equivocal late-night Cocoa at 7 Eccles Street." It shows their own union, a bond other members of the family did not have, and how the two very real people come together and see eye to eye on acceptance and embracing who they are, something done through the use of Bechdel's father's beloved literature.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Allison Bechdel's story of her coming out as a lesbian while uncovering the mystery of her father's secret gay life is one that's very confusing and takes quite a bit of thinking to understand. Throughout my reading Fun Home, I realized the similarities between her father and Bechdel herself.
To me, it seems the two are trying to break away from what they could consider to be "social norms." I feel the two characters search for acceptance in a way. On page 98, Bechdel writes, "Not only were we inverts. We were inversions of one another." Looking back and analyzing this quote carefully, I realize that Bechdel is comparing herself to her father to convey the similarities between them. I think by "invert" Bechdel means that the two can successfully mask who they really are, Bechdel being a lesbian and her father, Bruce, being a secret gay man. The two, despite their true sexual orientation, are attempting to be socially accepted in what is normal of society today.
Beneath this statement, there is a large picture of the two dressing to get ready for a wedding. Bechdel is a young girl. The quote explains the picture. Bechdel states," While I was trying to compensate for something unmanly in him, he was attempting to express something feminine through me. This statement speaks for itself. In a twisted sense, the two are trying to show their real selves for another. It would not be socially accepted for Bechdel's father to dress feminine and express an openly gay life. Instead, he expresses his true feminine thoughts and what he really wants for himself through his daughter, a reason he is so hard on her and presses her to dress like a girl because that was what he may have wanted for himself at his daughter's age.
Bechdel, on the other hand, always had a masculine side to her, something commonly seen in lesbians. There was always something feminine about her father, as the quote and stories of his male experiences goes. Bechdel on the other hand, loved masculinity, and it was not accepted for a young girl not to dress like one in society. The two were going against how they truly felt, yet were compensating for one another, essentially working together in one mix.
An easier way to put the situation is a quote on page 99. Bechdel writes, " But I wanted the muscles and tweed like my father wanted the velvet and pearls-subjectively, for myself." It seems the two led different paths, different orientations, and secret lives within themselves. But the one factor they had in common was in a sense, living through each other. Bechdel and her masculine side, yet having to accept femininity, and her father and his feminine side, yet his outward sense of masculinity was portrayed in his daughter's secret side. The two collide beautifully in a twisted sense as well as coming together by the end of the book.
To me, it seems the two are trying to break away from what they could consider to be "social norms." I feel the two characters search for acceptance in a way. On page 98, Bechdel writes, "Not only were we inverts. We were inversions of one another." Looking back and analyzing this quote carefully, I realize that Bechdel is comparing herself to her father to convey the similarities between them. I think by "invert" Bechdel means that the two can successfully mask who they really are, Bechdel being a lesbian and her father, Bruce, being a secret gay man. The two, despite their true sexual orientation, are attempting to be socially accepted in what is normal of society today.
Beneath this statement, there is a large picture of the two dressing to get ready for a wedding. Bechdel is a young girl. The quote explains the picture. Bechdel states," While I was trying to compensate for something unmanly in him, he was attempting to express something feminine through me. This statement speaks for itself. In a twisted sense, the two are trying to show their real selves for another. It would not be socially accepted for Bechdel's father to dress feminine and express an openly gay life. Instead, he expresses his true feminine thoughts and what he really wants for himself through his daughter, a reason he is so hard on her and presses her to dress like a girl because that was what he may have wanted for himself at his daughter's age.
Bechdel, on the other hand, always had a masculine side to her, something commonly seen in lesbians. There was always something feminine about her father, as the quote and stories of his male experiences goes. Bechdel on the other hand, loved masculinity, and it was not accepted for a young girl not to dress like one in society. The two were going against how they truly felt, yet were compensating for one another, essentially working together in one mix.
An easier way to put the situation is a quote on page 99. Bechdel writes, " But I wanted the muscles and tweed like my father wanted the velvet and pearls-subjectively, for myself." It seems the two led different paths, different orientations, and secret lives within themselves. But the one factor they had in common was in a sense, living through each other. Bechdel and her masculine side, yet having to accept femininity, and her father and his feminine side, yet his outward sense of masculinity was portrayed in his daughter's secret side. The two collide beautifully in a twisted sense as well as coming together by the end of the book.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Ending of In The Time of Butterflies
Reading the end of this novel really gave me an insight as to what exactly happened the day of the three Mirabel sister's deaths. The story ends with Minerva's last narration on November 25th. The epilogue lets Dedé to continue the story.
The story has it that the women were traveling down a road with their driver, Rufino after visiting their husbands in jail, a jail they were purposely moved to because the SIM knew they would have to travel down that road. This specific road was where the sisters were murdered and then placed in the old Jeep, and pushed off a cliff.
Like Alvarez, I wondered why this happened. Did the girls know they were to meet the face of death that fateful day?
"It is the sweetness that makes them burn." While Alvarez's character Dedé was talking about sugar on page 320 here, I realized that this could be a reason as to why the Mirabels risked their lives that tragic day. To elaborate, the Mirabels always knew their lives were at risk, especially after starting the underground and being so actively involved. I'm sure they all knew eventually, their "luck" of being alive would run out. They knew their husbands were in trouble in the jail; the sisters were willing to risk that to see them one last time. I'm sure they had premonitions the roads could be dangerous.On page 297, Alvarez states through Minerva that " ...it was as if we were girls again, walking through the dark part of the year, a little afraid, a little excited by our fears..." To me, this means that they knew there could be a chance things could change on their journey home, obviously doing so. What I realized, despite the unknown, was that they came so far in the revolution, changing lives in the sense of involving others to fight what was right for their country of the Dominican Republic. They were role models for women to come, proving women are strong, have opinions, and can fight for what they find important like the Mirabels did. They came so far... why not go all out and "fight" till the end? On page 302, Alvarez states that Patria's last words were "Tell the Mirabel family in Salcedo that the calíes are going to kill us!" I think the Mirabels felt they came so far with their underground revolution, they should be strong and fight till then end. They knew their chances of being murdered were high, yet they stuck to their morals and continued to meet with their husbands. It was their greatest honor because they were all in it together, and they knew they would leave this earth happy they succeeded great things.
While this could be one possibility as to what the Mirabels did what they did, I think the answer speaks for itself. They truly fought till the end.
The story has it that the women were traveling down a road with their driver, Rufino after visiting their husbands in jail, a jail they were purposely moved to because the SIM knew they would have to travel down that road. This specific road was where the sisters were murdered and then placed in the old Jeep, and pushed off a cliff.
Like Alvarez, I wondered why this happened. Did the girls know they were to meet the face of death that fateful day?
"It is the sweetness that makes them burn." While Alvarez's character Dedé was talking about sugar on page 320 here, I realized that this could be a reason as to why the Mirabels risked their lives that tragic day. To elaborate, the Mirabels always knew their lives were at risk, especially after starting the underground and being so actively involved. I'm sure they all knew eventually, their "luck" of being alive would run out. They knew their husbands were in trouble in the jail; the sisters were willing to risk that to see them one last time. I'm sure they had premonitions the roads could be dangerous.On page 297, Alvarez states through Minerva that " ...it was as if we were girls again, walking through the dark part of the year, a little afraid, a little excited by our fears..." To me, this means that they knew there could be a chance things could change on their journey home, obviously doing so. What I realized, despite the unknown, was that they came so far in the revolution, changing lives in the sense of involving others to fight what was right for their country of the Dominican Republic. They were role models for women to come, proving women are strong, have opinions, and can fight for what they find important like the Mirabels did. They came so far... why not go all out and "fight" till the end? On page 302, Alvarez states that Patria's last words were "Tell the Mirabel family in Salcedo that the calíes are going to kill us!" I think the Mirabels felt they came so far with their underground revolution, they should be strong and fight till then end. They knew their chances of being murdered were high, yet they stuck to their morals and continued to meet with their husbands. It was their greatest honor because they were all in it together, and they knew they would leave this earth happy they succeeded great things.
While this could be one possibility as to what the Mirabels did what they did, I think the answer speaks for itself. They truly fought till the end.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
María Teresa
One interesting character in the book In The Time of Butterflies by Julia Alvarez is the youngest Mirabel sister, María Teresa, best known as Mate. With an adorable sense of innocence, yet possessing independence, thought, and strength, I shall follow her path and how she evolves throughout the book.
-Mate was born October 15th, 1935. Her story starts in her first section of the book. She starts evolving into her own person and voicing her thoughts with the very first diary she was given by her older sister, Minerva as a gift for her First Communion at the age of 10.
-Feb. 18th, 1946 was the first time Mate lied for Minerva in school when she was caught sneaking out of school to visit a "sick" relative.
-July 23rd- Mate writes her final entry in her first diary and unfortunately has to bury it because there were people's names mentioned, those that have gotten in trouble with the law. Mate can not keep it in case she gets caught.
The second part that highlights Mate's Timeline is in her second chapter.
-December 15th, 1953. Mate has grown a bit, and is discussing her father's funeral, and how awkward yet angering it was for Mate to meet her "other" sisters, the children her father had with his mistress.
-July 3rd. We are now faced with Mate's graduation, a huge jump in the book. She discusses everything about her graduation party... as well as the fact her aunt is trying to make her decide between a possible suitor between her two cousins, Berto and Raul. Talk about a tough decision! This shows how life was in their culture and how much Mate has grown as a woman.
-Sept 18th- Mate and Minerva, her role model, are leaving for the capital. While she is there, the reader can see how Mate evolves into somewhat of her own person by not following in her sister's footsteps as a career being a lawyer, but decides to study Philosophy and Letters.
-April 28th- Mate receives an amazing honor to be Queen of the Capital, which is an equivalent to a Class Honorary. She has Minerva help her with her speech.
-July 28th, 1957- Mate moves in with Minerva, and has sensed something is wrong between Minerva and her husband, Manolo.
-Sept 7th. A couple of months pass by, and somehow, Mate has brought Minerva and her husband back together and "saved" their marraige. Who could think the naive one could help save a marraige?
-Sept 28th- In her sister's apartment, a man named Palomino making a delivery shows up. This is the first true encounter Mate has had with a man that she realizes if she was married, she could not give up. The next day Mate discovers the revolution that her sister is involved in. She is then named Mariposa, her code name.
-Dec 16th- Mate finally confesses her love to Palomino, whose real name is Leandro. He obviously, feels the same.
-Feb 14th, 1958. Mate marries Leandro Guzmán Rodríguez.
We then jump to the third section. A lot has occurred. Now the sisters are imprisoned and refuse to be pardoned.
-March 16th. Mate keeps yet another diary, or as she puts it, notebook.
-March 22nd. Mate finally breaks down. She says she feels she will never leave, and I can only imagine what a feeling that is. She explains how it's common for the women to break down frequently.
-March 24th. Mate describes her experience being questioned by the guards.
-April 1st. Mate finally (which I found a bit impressive) states to her sister openly how she feels she can not take this before. It bothers Mate her daughter is growing up without her. Obviously, Minerva tries to calm her... How long can they hold out together?
-April 2nd. Mate finally realizes she is alone. Her sister was put into solitary for three weeks and she is now alone. Mate explains she hears a voice that says, "Mariposa does not belong to herself alone," meaning she has never been on her own before. Can she handle it? Mate then writes, "Courage, and this time I felt it."
-April 7th. Mate finally sees some of her family members, and gets excited at the thought of her mom bringing her little girl by to see her!
-Date unknown. Mate has been very sick, I presume. She explains how she has stopped bleeding, unsure if it was a period or a miscarraige of a child. She goes on to say how her friend, Magdalena is nursing her. She hopes to get better...
-May 25th. Mate and Minerva are arraigned. Unfortunately, they were taken to the court to wind up not being able to defend themselves without proper representation. Mate cries.
-June 27th. Things seem to get worse. Now Mate is getting word of a rumor that her husband, Leandro is being accused of a traitor. How can she help him in prison herself? She is very worried.
-July 11th. Mate has an experience with a female friend in prison, Magdalena. They kiss. I think Magdalena was an outlet for her to express her feelings on being in prison, her worries and fears.
-August 7th. Mate leaves the prison, and is feeling sad to leave behind her newfound "sisters."
Time will only tell what else happens to Mate. As one can see, she has come far in her journey. A long, intimidating, and dangerous one, but a journey nonetheless.
-Mate was born October 15th, 1935. Her story starts in her first section of the book. She starts evolving into her own person and voicing her thoughts with the very first diary she was given by her older sister, Minerva as a gift for her First Communion at the age of 10.
-Feb. 18th, 1946 was the first time Mate lied for Minerva in school when she was caught sneaking out of school to visit a "sick" relative.
-July 23rd- Mate writes her final entry in her first diary and unfortunately has to bury it because there were people's names mentioned, those that have gotten in trouble with the law. Mate can not keep it in case she gets caught.
The second part that highlights Mate's Timeline is in her second chapter.
-December 15th, 1953. Mate has grown a bit, and is discussing her father's funeral, and how awkward yet angering it was for Mate to meet her "other" sisters, the children her father had with his mistress.
-July 3rd. We are now faced with Mate's graduation, a huge jump in the book. She discusses everything about her graduation party... as well as the fact her aunt is trying to make her decide between a possible suitor between her two cousins, Berto and Raul. Talk about a tough decision! This shows how life was in their culture and how much Mate has grown as a woman.
-Sept 18th- Mate and Minerva, her role model, are leaving for the capital. While she is there, the reader can see how Mate evolves into somewhat of her own person by not following in her sister's footsteps as a career being a lawyer, but decides to study Philosophy and Letters.
-April 28th- Mate receives an amazing honor to be Queen of the Capital, which is an equivalent to a Class Honorary. She has Minerva help her with her speech.
-July 28th, 1957- Mate moves in with Minerva, and has sensed something is wrong between Minerva and her husband, Manolo.
-Sept 7th. A couple of months pass by, and somehow, Mate has brought Minerva and her husband back together and "saved" their marraige. Who could think the naive one could help save a marraige?
-Sept 28th- In her sister's apartment, a man named Palomino making a delivery shows up. This is the first true encounter Mate has had with a man that she realizes if she was married, she could not give up. The next day Mate discovers the revolution that her sister is involved in. She is then named Mariposa, her code name.
-Dec 16th- Mate finally confesses her love to Palomino, whose real name is Leandro. He obviously, feels the same.
-Feb 14th, 1958. Mate marries Leandro Guzmán Rodríguez.
We then jump to the third section. A lot has occurred. Now the sisters are imprisoned and refuse to be pardoned.
-March 16th. Mate keeps yet another diary, or as she puts it, notebook.
-March 22nd. Mate finally breaks down. She says she feels she will never leave, and I can only imagine what a feeling that is. She explains how it's common for the women to break down frequently.
-March 24th. Mate describes her experience being questioned by the guards.
-April 1st. Mate finally (which I found a bit impressive) states to her sister openly how she feels she can not take this before. It bothers Mate her daughter is growing up without her. Obviously, Minerva tries to calm her... How long can they hold out together?
-April 2nd. Mate finally realizes she is alone. Her sister was put into solitary for three weeks and she is now alone. Mate explains she hears a voice that says, "Mariposa does not belong to herself alone," meaning she has never been on her own before. Can she handle it? Mate then writes, "Courage, and this time I felt it."
-April 7th. Mate finally sees some of her family members, and gets excited at the thought of her mom bringing her little girl by to see her!
-Date unknown. Mate has been very sick, I presume. She explains how she has stopped bleeding, unsure if it was a period or a miscarraige of a child. She goes on to say how her friend, Magdalena is nursing her. She hopes to get better...
-May 25th. Mate and Minerva are arraigned. Unfortunately, they were taken to the court to wind up not being able to defend themselves without proper representation. Mate cries.
-June 27th. Things seem to get worse. Now Mate is getting word of a rumor that her husband, Leandro is being accused of a traitor. How can she help him in prison herself? She is very worried.
-July 11th. Mate has an experience with a female friend in prison, Magdalena. They kiss. I think Magdalena was an outlet for her to express her feelings on being in prison, her worries and fears.
-August 7th. Mate leaves the prison, and is feeling sad to leave behind her newfound "sisters."
Time will only tell what else happens to Mate. As one can see, she has come far in her journey. A long, intimidating, and dangerous one, but a journey nonetheless.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Could you do what Déde did?
In part three of In The Time of Butterflies bu Julia Alvarez, I really started thinking about Déde's thoughts and opinions on the retreat. As stated, Déde was the only Mirabel sister that did not get directly involved with the meetings and what not. It really started to get me think as to what I'd do if I was in her situation.
Before Déde actually starts discussing her thoughts, fears, and excuses for not joining her sisters in their organization, she is strongly considering it. Minerva informs her of a meeting they will be having at Patria's house. Déde has decided to leave her husband, Jaimito, who has become unusually cruel and nasty partially due to his excessive drinking. I think Déde partially wants to join them as proof to herself that she is her own person and can get away from her husband, and she does not need anyone else to protect her. Alvarez writes on page 182, "I need to get out. I cannot go on with this travesty." I think this is what Déde is thinking. She is trying to prove to herself that she can be her own person and is capable of making her own decisions, such as joining her sisters in the revolt. I definitely can relate with Déde's thought process here. Who wouldn't want to be capable of making their own decisions? It's not as if Jaimito runs her life, despite what he may think.
Although, Déde does have a huge decision to make. If I had to make this decision as to join my family or not right now at my age, it would not be as crucial because I not married and do not have responsibilities to my own family like she does, such as her three children. What I notice is that Déde has to worry about her children and her husband as well as her mother. It's almost as if she is on the fence about this business and is trying to find every possible excuse to keep her from joining her sisters. It really made me wonder. Would I be so ready to leave my kids and unsupporting husband while I join the dangerous fight? I don't think I could...
She then decides to meet with Padre de Jesús, the priest for an insight. At the church, Déde realizes that he is one of the revolutionaries along with her very own sisters! On page 184, Alvarez writes, "And she knew, right then adn there, that she could not go through with this business. Jaimito was an excuse. She was afraid, plain and simple." While some people may think Déde was being selfish to not want to support her sisters and fight for what she may believed is right for her country, I do not. I feel every person is different. Déde has a family to worry about and a husband. I feel that it is selfless of her to stay with her family and protect them as opposed to putting herself on the line. If anything, she could wind up killed or severely wounded. Déde decides to not go so she can be there with the alive and healthy, supporting her family.
I feel if I was in Déde's shoes, I would do the same thing. I would hate the thought of leaving behind my kids and my doting husband, knowing there was a strong risk I could never see them again. I think Déde is smart for her decision, especially because of the ending of this book. She essentially did think for herself in the end and made the conscious decision to be there for her family.
Before Déde actually starts discussing her thoughts, fears, and excuses for not joining her sisters in their organization, she is strongly considering it. Minerva informs her of a meeting they will be having at Patria's house. Déde has decided to leave her husband, Jaimito, who has become unusually cruel and nasty partially due to his excessive drinking. I think Déde partially wants to join them as proof to herself that she is her own person and can get away from her husband, and she does not need anyone else to protect her. Alvarez writes on page 182, "I need to get out. I cannot go on with this travesty." I think this is what Déde is thinking. She is trying to prove to herself that she can be her own person and is capable of making her own decisions, such as joining her sisters in the revolt. I definitely can relate with Déde's thought process here. Who wouldn't want to be capable of making their own decisions? It's not as if Jaimito runs her life, despite what he may think.
Although, Déde does have a huge decision to make. If I had to make this decision as to join my family or not right now at my age, it would not be as crucial because I not married and do not have responsibilities to my own family like she does, such as her three children. What I notice is that Déde has to worry about her children and her husband as well as her mother. It's almost as if she is on the fence about this business and is trying to find every possible excuse to keep her from joining her sisters. It really made me wonder. Would I be so ready to leave my kids and unsupporting husband while I join the dangerous fight? I don't think I could...
She then decides to meet with Padre de Jesús, the priest for an insight. At the church, Déde realizes that he is one of the revolutionaries along with her very own sisters! On page 184, Alvarez writes, "And she knew, right then adn there, that she could not go through with this business. Jaimito was an excuse. She was afraid, plain and simple." While some people may think Déde was being selfish to not want to support her sisters and fight for what she may believed is right for her country, I do not. I feel every person is different. Déde has a family to worry about and a husband. I feel that it is selfless of her to stay with her family and protect them as opposed to putting herself on the line. If anything, she could wind up killed or severely wounded. Déde decides to not go so she can be there with the alive and healthy, supporting her family.
I feel if I was in Déde's shoes, I would do the same thing. I would hate the thought of leaving behind my kids and my doting husband, knowing there was a strong risk I could never see them again. I think Déde is smart for her decision, especially because of the ending of this book. She essentially did think for herself in the end and made the conscious decision to be there for her family.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
In the Time of Butterflies- Julia Alvarez
What I have really enjoyed so far about this book is the distinction between the main characters. I feel each represents an important factor in the time period of this book in the Dominican Republic. I feel these factors can each represent a butterfly, in essence all connecting to freedom.
There are four Mirabel sisters: Patria, the oldest, Minerva, Déde, and Mate, the youngest. Patria is the woman bearing all children, and ironically enough is the most religious one. At one point, she even considered the convent, until other passions took way that led her to her husband. Minerva is the rebellious one, the one who has yet to search for a man, but instead is more of a feminist and speaks out against the government and the Dominican Republic's dictator, Trujillo. Déde, the survivor of the group, is the one who lives to tell the story. She continues on with her life, marries her cousin, and has a family. Mate, the one who keeps a diary, is very naive and innocent. She idolizes her sister Minerva. So far ,I have noticed that each character seems to symbolize different things, such as emotions. Patria represents faith, something important to have during this time period where people were rebelling against the president, and if not following his order, could be killed. By having a faith in God, it instills hopes the country can gain some independence and get better. For example, on page 59, Alvarez writes in Patria's chapter, "Here Patria Mercedes, I'm here, all around you. I've already more than appeared." This shows that by keeping a strong faith in the Lord, He can help to give signs and guid a person through life, regardless of diffifculties. She is strong for continuing it, despite all of the horrible scenarios occurring in her country.
Minerva definitely represents strength. She has the gall to stick up for what she believes in. For example, she flat out tells Trujillo she wants to go to the university at a gala they both appear at. It makes me nervous for her, because it was uncommon for a woman to speak out against a man then.
For Déde, she represents stability. In the unknown deaths so far of the three sisters, Déde lived to tell the tale. She still continues on with her neices, and her husband, something after a tragedy is hard to do. On page 65, Alvarez explains Déde as "the only one left to manage the terrible, beautiful present." While it is had for her to do so, I feel that is an admirable and wonderful trait, something difficult to do. She is strong enough to do so.This reminds me of myself. Mate represents innocence and fear. While the reader may wonder, how does this represent freedom? Mate is strong in the sense that she is able to openly voice her thoughts and opinions, even in something as small as a diary! She writes about her fears for her country, her family, and other matters in her life. How can one be so brave when there could be a high risk for one finding it?
All strongly represent "free butterflies," but in different ways. Patria's is a freedom of faith, meaning she can believe in any higher power she wants, not necessarily turn to Trujillo. Minerva obviously represents freedom of speech, such as in the way she casually mentions going to university to the president, a man known for keeping many mistresses and mistreating women. Déde represents just the strength to live, something I can identify with. Despite the traumatic happenings of losing her closest family, I have noticed she never became twisted. She never "fell away" from herself, by resulting in hazardous matters. She kept on going with her life, and has to painfully live through every November when reporters come by to question the massacre of her sisters. I honestly don't know how she can do that... but it's something I strongly admire. Mate represents freedom of thought. Despite the fact anyone could find her diary and expose her, she keeps one anyways, as a way of coping with what she deals with every day. All represent different forms of strength... but the true form of a butterfly, free to roam and find their own paths.
There are four Mirabel sisters: Patria, the oldest, Minerva, Déde, and Mate, the youngest. Patria is the woman bearing all children, and ironically enough is the most religious one. At one point, she even considered the convent, until other passions took way that led her to her husband. Minerva is the rebellious one, the one who has yet to search for a man, but instead is more of a feminist and speaks out against the government and the Dominican Republic's dictator, Trujillo. Déde, the survivor of the group, is the one who lives to tell the story. She continues on with her life, marries her cousin, and has a family. Mate, the one who keeps a diary, is very naive and innocent. She idolizes her sister Minerva. So far ,I have noticed that each character seems to symbolize different things, such as emotions. Patria represents faith, something important to have during this time period where people were rebelling against the president, and if not following his order, could be killed. By having a faith in God, it instills hopes the country can gain some independence and get better. For example, on page 59, Alvarez writes in Patria's chapter, "Here Patria Mercedes, I'm here, all around you. I've already more than appeared." This shows that by keeping a strong faith in the Lord, He can help to give signs and guid a person through life, regardless of diffifculties. She is strong for continuing it, despite all of the horrible scenarios occurring in her country.
Minerva definitely represents strength. She has the gall to stick up for what she believes in. For example, she flat out tells Trujillo she wants to go to the university at a gala they both appear at. It makes me nervous for her, because it was uncommon for a woman to speak out against a man then.
For Déde, she represents stability. In the unknown deaths so far of the three sisters, Déde lived to tell the tale. She still continues on with her neices, and her husband, something after a tragedy is hard to do. On page 65, Alvarez explains Déde as "the only one left to manage the terrible, beautiful present." While it is had for her to do so, I feel that is an admirable and wonderful trait, something difficult to do. She is strong enough to do so.This reminds me of myself. Mate represents innocence and fear. While the reader may wonder, how does this represent freedom? Mate is strong in the sense that she is able to openly voice her thoughts and opinions, even in something as small as a diary! She writes about her fears for her country, her family, and other matters in her life. How can one be so brave when there could be a high risk for one finding it?
All strongly represent "free butterflies," but in different ways. Patria's is a freedom of faith, meaning she can believe in any higher power she wants, not necessarily turn to Trujillo. Minerva obviously represents freedom of speech, such as in the way she casually mentions going to university to the president, a man known for keeping many mistresses and mistreating women. Déde represents just the strength to live, something I can identify with. Despite the traumatic happenings of losing her closest family, I have noticed she never became twisted. She never "fell away" from herself, by resulting in hazardous matters. She kept on going with her life, and has to painfully live through every November when reporters come by to question the massacre of her sisters. I honestly don't know how she can do that... but it's something I strongly admire. Mate represents freedom of thought. Despite the fact anyone could find her diary and expose her, she keeps one anyways, as a way of coping with what she deals with every day. All represent different forms of strength... but the true form of a butterfly, free to roam and find their own paths.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
What Women Should be Expected of- IAAEC by Eve Ensler
While I enjoyed almost every monologue in I am an Emotional Creature by Eve Ensler, I would have to say that the epilogue really struck me hard. I remember last semester in my English class writing an essay on women's expectations in today's society. I can easily identify Ensler's opinions with my own in the ending of the book.
Ensler has two sections in this epilogue. The first discusses "what you will be told" in today's world as a woman or a girl. Here are some statements that girls today are sadly STILL being told:
On page 142 Ensler writes: "You are nothing without a man/Don't make the first move/wait for him to notice you/Obey the laws/ Don't know too much/It's how you look that matters, not what you think." While I my self can't personally identify with the above statements, I could not believe what I was reading. I was feeling a mixture of emotions, and honestly, was angry at these statements. I always pictured those mantras to be the way of living when my mom, aunt, and even my grandmother were growing up. Not in today's society. When I was growing up, I was always taught that I should go for my dreams, always push for more, get a formal education, and that I could be equal and anything I wanted to be, like a man was allowed. I was taught that when searching for a partner, looks are not the most important thing, but what was important was how he treated you and how he valued your thoughts and opinions. When I read that, I was shocked and a little angered to think women and girls are still being misled in this direction.
There is also a section entitled "Here's What I'm Telling You." On page 144, Ensler writes something that really made me re-evaluate myself as a woman. Here are a few lines: "Why am I whispering when I have something to say?/ Why am I adding a question mark at the end/of all my sentences? Why am I apologizing every time I express my needs?/ Pretending it doesn't mean that much to me?" At this point, I honestly stopped and read over each word more carefully. As much as I hate admitting this to the public eye of Blogger, I have to admit... I do these things almost every day. I thought that I was past that, that my 15 year old self had long since been gone and being an adult and finally a woman, I thought that I had achieved a new found confidence, that I was starting to become more sure of myself, and that I was starting to stop caring what people thought of me.After reading that, though, I realized I was wrong. While I have become more confident and sure of myself, I also constantly second-guess myself after placing my opinion, saying something to someone I thought could have been funny, and so on and so forth. Honestly... I should be proud of who I am, what I like an dislike, my background, my passions, my weaknesses, etc. The only way to improve upon these issues that are bestowed upon women today is to embrace who we are, despite the opinions of others.
Ensler helped me realize that. She has inspired me to be proud of who I am and where I come from as well as become confident with myself and defend myself, as well. I honestly feel every woman should ask herself these questions. If not, one could continue a journey of self-destruction, self-esteem issues, etc. Ensler has inspired me to be happy with who I am and being what I ultimately am: an emotional creature.
Ensler has two sections in this epilogue. The first discusses "what you will be told" in today's world as a woman or a girl. Here are some statements that girls today are sadly STILL being told:
On page 142 Ensler writes: "You are nothing without a man/Don't make the first move/wait for him to notice you/Obey the laws/ Don't know too much/It's how you look that matters, not what you think." While I my self can't personally identify with the above statements, I could not believe what I was reading. I was feeling a mixture of emotions, and honestly, was angry at these statements. I always pictured those mantras to be the way of living when my mom, aunt, and even my grandmother were growing up. Not in today's society. When I was growing up, I was always taught that I should go for my dreams, always push for more, get a formal education, and that I could be equal and anything I wanted to be, like a man was allowed. I was taught that when searching for a partner, looks are not the most important thing, but what was important was how he treated you and how he valued your thoughts and opinions. When I read that, I was shocked and a little angered to think women and girls are still being misled in this direction.
There is also a section entitled "Here's What I'm Telling You." On page 144, Ensler writes something that really made me re-evaluate myself as a woman. Here are a few lines: "Why am I whispering when I have something to say?/ Why am I adding a question mark at the end/of all my sentences? Why am I apologizing every time I express my needs?/ Pretending it doesn't mean that much to me?" At this point, I honestly stopped and read over each word more carefully. As much as I hate admitting this to the public eye of Blogger, I have to admit... I do these things almost every day. I thought that I was past that, that my 15 year old self had long since been gone and being an adult and finally a woman, I thought that I had achieved a new found confidence, that I was starting to become more sure of myself, and that I was starting to stop caring what people thought of me.After reading that, though, I realized I was wrong. While I have become more confident and sure of myself, I also constantly second-guess myself after placing my opinion, saying something to someone I thought could have been funny, and so on and so forth. Honestly... I should be proud of who I am, what I like an dislike, my background, my passions, my weaknesses, etc. The only way to improve upon these issues that are bestowed upon women today is to embrace who we are, despite the opinions of others.
Ensler helped me realize that. She has inspired me to be proud of who I am and where I come from as well as become confident with myself and defend myself, as well. I honestly feel every woman should ask herself these questions. If not, one could continue a journey of self-destruction, self-esteem issues, etc. Ensler has inspired me to be happy with who I am and being what I ultimately am: an emotional creature.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
I Dance- Best Poem Ever
So my title for this blog is very informal... yet VERY personal. In Eve Ensler's lastest book, I am an Emotional Creature, I thought at first it was another book targeted to end violence towards women. I wanted something different... and believe it or not, I found it in this book.
What I love about this book thus far is how all of the monologues Ensler writes can relate to girls and their issues, regardless of what they may be or their age. This book has monologues to express types of emotions, actions, thoughts, and opinions girls/women may feel, but are taught to keep silent in today's society. One specific monologue Ensler wrote on page 52 I instantly fell in love with. The piece is titled, "I Dance." I am a natural -born dancer for fifteen years now. Dance is my world and one of my greatest passions. So this passage specifically reached out to me in a major way.
On page 53, Ensler writes, "I dance to disappear, I dance to know I'm here, I dance cuz I'm horny, 'cause it's holy, 'cause I want to forget." When I read this, I IMMEDIATELY felt a connection. Whenever I'm stressed, feel like I don't belong, or need to get out my emotions in an artistic way, I dance. Feeling the music pulsing through my veins, the aggressive and rapidly fast beats causing an addicting sensation to move throughout my body, causing me to "bust out" incredible dance moves is a great feeling. This girl is saying this is a way she gets out her emotions and feelings. She dances as a means of expression and to feel. I feel she even does it because it is obviously important to her, an essence as to who she is, and a reason for living... like myself. Ensler also writes something that really hit home for me on page 53: "'Cause it's the only thing you can't take away/ I dance 'cause it keeps me separate/from everyone else's opinions and ideas." Again, something I can relate to. I feel dance is the one thing that makes me feel confident. With dance, I can do anything, BE anything. I can stick to my ideas, my morals, and values, and don't have to listen to anyone else's opinion. I can just be me and do what I do best. I think this girl and myself would have been great friends, because I feel as if I already know her. One page 54, Ensler also touches base on serious issues. She writes: "I shake off restrictions and illegitimate rules/I shake off your suffocating warnings/ I dance to the heartbeat of life/ I dance because girls are the ultimate survivors." While the girl dances for herself, I realize she dances because she has the freedom to. In today's society, there are so many rules, and so many hypocrisies that make it okay for men to state their opinions and thoughts, but women are expected to stay quiet. this girl is saying here she has no restrictions. She can just be free like a butterfly and be herself, which I think is a truly beautiful thing. She doesn't have to worry about anything, but perfecting a move and being crazy. She proves she CAN survive all through her love for dance. And this ladies, and gentleman, is I believe Ensler's finest piece.
What I love about this book thus far is how all of the monologues Ensler writes can relate to girls and their issues, regardless of what they may be or their age. This book has monologues to express types of emotions, actions, thoughts, and opinions girls/women may feel, but are taught to keep silent in today's society. One specific monologue Ensler wrote on page 52 I instantly fell in love with. The piece is titled, "I Dance." I am a natural -born dancer for fifteen years now. Dance is my world and one of my greatest passions. So this passage specifically reached out to me in a major way.
On page 53, Ensler writes, "I dance to disappear, I dance to know I'm here, I dance cuz I'm horny, 'cause it's holy, 'cause I want to forget." When I read this, I IMMEDIATELY felt a connection. Whenever I'm stressed, feel like I don't belong, or need to get out my emotions in an artistic way, I dance. Feeling the music pulsing through my veins, the aggressive and rapidly fast beats causing an addicting sensation to move throughout my body, causing me to "bust out" incredible dance moves is a great feeling. This girl is saying this is a way she gets out her emotions and feelings. She dances as a means of expression and to feel. I feel she even does it because it is obviously important to her, an essence as to who she is, and a reason for living... like myself. Ensler also writes something that really hit home for me on page 53: "'Cause it's the only thing you can't take away/ I dance 'cause it keeps me separate/from everyone else's opinions and ideas." Again, something I can relate to. I feel dance is the one thing that makes me feel confident. With dance, I can do anything, BE anything. I can stick to my ideas, my morals, and values, and don't have to listen to anyone else's opinion. I can just be me and do what I do best. I think this girl and myself would have been great friends, because I feel as if I already know her. One page 54, Ensler also touches base on serious issues. She writes: "I shake off restrictions and illegitimate rules/I shake off your suffocating warnings/ I dance to the heartbeat of life/ I dance because girls are the ultimate survivors." While the girl dances for herself, I realize she dances because she has the freedom to. In today's society, there are so many rules, and so many hypocrisies that make it okay for men to state their opinions and thoughts, but women are expected to stay quiet. this girl is saying here she has no restrictions. She can just be free like a butterfly and be herself, which I think is a truly beautiful thing. She doesn't have to worry about anything, but perfecting a move and being crazy. She proves she CAN survive all through her love for dance. And this ladies, and gentleman, is I believe Ensler's finest piece.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
TVM Analysis
This book was totally different than I expected. While I expected something really funny and random, what I got were realizations not only about women and the "hushed about" topic of the vagina, but I also learned more about myself, as well.
I never realized how how much violence was going on in the world; some is absolutely astounding. For example, on page 66, according to The Woman's Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets, it is said that "In the United States, the last recorded clitoridectomy for curing masturbation was performed in 1948- on a five year old girl." I think anyone, women particularly, regardless of time frame, would be mortified and completely appalled reading that fact. It really made me wonder about how much society has evolved over time. For example, while during that time period it was accepted for men to be sexual and be open about it, but it was expected of women to be completely shut up and never mention the topic. Back then, women were expected to be pure and remain innocent until possibly marriage. The ironic fact about it is that women are the ones that help to pro-create this world...
What I liked about TVM was that I got to learn through reading other monologues about women's experiences finding their own vagina and being at one with it, which I think is essentially important. If a woman is not in touch with her body, how will she know what is good and bad, and how to prevent against situations, such as being, raped, mutilated, or abused? There is one influential example of a woman who wants the best for her vagina. One page 73, Ensler writes, "It wants sex. It loves sex. It wants kindness. It wants change. It wants silence and freedom and gentle kisses and warm liquids and deep touch. My vagina. Well... it wants everything." I feel this quote is so powerful and beautiful. Here is a prime example of women we need in today's society; we need women who are in touch with themselves, their personal experiences, no matter how traumatic or endearing, who can face what she wants and handle it. She knows how to protect, worship, and love her body the way every woman should. I think the problem with our society today is that we never know which way to turn. Women were brought up to not talk about vaginas, sex, and the other horrific things that can come along with it, like rape, abuse, etc. The fact that she did was eye-opening.
While it doesn't seem the woman is talking about her vagina as a way to fight against women's violence, it is. She is embracing her body, her vagina, for what it is, what it needs, so on and so forth. This is what Ensler was trying to say in her book, which I think is a truly positive message.
I never realized how how much violence was going on in the world; some is absolutely astounding. For example, on page 66, according to The Woman's Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets, it is said that "In the United States, the last recorded clitoridectomy for curing masturbation was performed in 1948- on a five year old girl." I think anyone, women particularly, regardless of time frame, would be mortified and completely appalled reading that fact. It really made me wonder about how much society has evolved over time. For example, while during that time period it was accepted for men to be sexual and be open about it, but it was expected of women to be completely shut up and never mention the topic. Back then, women were expected to be pure and remain innocent until possibly marriage. The ironic fact about it is that women are the ones that help to pro-create this world...
What I liked about TVM was that I got to learn through reading other monologues about women's experiences finding their own vagina and being at one with it, which I think is essentially important. If a woman is not in touch with her body, how will she know what is good and bad, and how to prevent against situations, such as being, raped, mutilated, or abused? There is one influential example of a woman who wants the best for her vagina. One page 73, Ensler writes, "It wants sex. It loves sex. It wants kindness. It wants change. It wants silence and freedom and gentle kisses and warm liquids and deep touch. My vagina. Well... it wants everything." I feel this quote is so powerful and beautiful. Here is a prime example of women we need in today's society; we need women who are in touch with themselves, their personal experiences, no matter how traumatic or endearing, who can face what she wants and handle it. She knows how to protect, worship, and love her body the way every woman should. I think the problem with our society today is that we never know which way to turn. Women were brought up to not talk about vaginas, sex, and the other horrific things that can come along with it, like rape, abuse, etc. The fact that she did was eye-opening.
While it doesn't seem the woman is talking about her vagina as a way to fight against women's violence, it is. She is embracing her body, her vagina, for what it is, what it needs, so on and so forth. This is what Ensler was trying to say in her book, which I think is a truly positive message.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Analysis of TVM
I really enjoyed reading TVM by Eve Ensler. It was unlike anything I've ever read in my entire life. I never knew there was so much violence in the world, especially towards women. I never looked at us "girls" in such a powerhouse like way. I never really paid attention to the fact that without women and their gift for expanding the world's population, no one would be here! From this book, I also started to appreciate the unspoken, grotesque word and meaning of "vagina." Something that helped me relate to the book and the topic of vaginas was her own personal story.
The last monologue in TVM is one based on Ensler's up, close and personal experience with vaginas entitled "I Was There In The Room," dedicated to her daughter-in-law, Shiva. The experience touched upon the birth of Shiva's daughter, Colette, and her vagina itself. The monologue touched upon different aspects and feelings women may have about the vagina. On page 122, Ensler writes, " I was there when her vagina changed from a shy sexual hole to an archaeological tunnel, a sacred vessel, a Venetian canal, a deep well with a tiny child stuck inside, waiting to be rescued." I never looked at the birth of a baby as a rescuing mission. Ensler strongly morphs the vagina from being a "shy sexual hole," representing something women were brought up to keep innocent and never discuss, into "an archaeological tunnel," something so big and important that only through this "tunnel" something so beautiful can come out of it, i.e. a baby. It is for the vagina and women that they have this ability, this "superpower" that no one other than the woman could understand that they can create lives, and "rescue" those leaving the body, like Shiva giving birth to her daughter. Ensler makes the experience very empowering for the woman, something I never looked at as being more than extremely painful and gross! On page 124, Ensler compares the vagina to a heart. When I first read this, I was in complete confusion and shock, thinking to myself how crazy it was a woman was comparing a heart to a VAGINA! But then I got what Ensler was trying to say. One page 124, she writes:
"The heart is capable of sacrifice. So is the vagina. It can change its shape to let us in. It can expand to let us out. So can the vagina. It can ache for us and stretch for us, die for us and bleed and bleed us into this diffuclt, wondrous world. So can the vagina. I was there in the room. I remember."
What this beautiful and deep quote is saying is that like the heart, the vagina can go through many sacrifices and risk pain, also, such as giving birth, or being raped, genitally mutilated, so on and so forth. Like the heart, the vagina can "let us in and let us out." The vagina can allow and reserves the right as to what enters it, and what is let out (like a baby.) We, as women, have that right. Like the heart, the vagina can "bleed us into this world", meaning we possess the power to expand the population. From reading this book, and this monologue, it only furthered my belief that women keep the world going around, and our bodies truly are temples. Without us, life as we know it would not exist, so respect is crucial. Thank you, Eve Ensler, for helping me realize this.
The last monologue in TVM is one based on Ensler's up, close and personal experience with vaginas entitled "I Was There In The Room," dedicated to her daughter-in-law, Shiva. The experience touched upon the birth of Shiva's daughter, Colette, and her vagina itself. The monologue touched upon different aspects and feelings women may have about the vagina. On page 122, Ensler writes, " I was there when her vagina changed from a shy sexual hole to an archaeological tunnel, a sacred vessel, a Venetian canal, a deep well with a tiny child stuck inside, waiting to be rescued." I never looked at the birth of a baby as a rescuing mission. Ensler strongly morphs the vagina from being a "shy sexual hole," representing something women were brought up to keep innocent and never discuss, into "an archaeological tunnel," something so big and important that only through this "tunnel" something so beautiful can come out of it, i.e. a baby. It is for the vagina and women that they have this ability, this "superpower" that no one other than the woman could understand that they can create lives, and "rescue" those leaving the body, like Shiva giving birth to her daughter. Ensler makes the experience very empowering for the woman, something I never looked at as being more than extremely painful and gross! On page 124, Ensler compares the vagina to a heart. When I first read this, I was in complete confusion and shock, thinking to myself how crazy it was a woman was comparing a heart to a VAGINA! But then I got what Ensler was trying to say. One page 124, she writes:
"The heart is capable of sacrifice. So is the vagina. It can change its shape to let us in. It can expand to let us out. So can the vagina. It can ache for us and stretch for us, die for us and bleed and bleed us into this diffuclt, wondrous world. So can the vagina. I was there in the room. I remember."
What this beautiful and deep quote is saying is that like the heart, the vagina can go through many sacrifices and risk pain, also, such as giving birth, or being raped, genitally mutilated, so on and so forth. Like the heart, the vagina can "let us in and let us out." The vagina can allow and reserves the right as to what enters it, and what is let out (like a baby.) We, as women, have that right. Like the heart, the vagina can "bleed us into this world", meaning we possess the power to expand the population. From reading this book, and this monologue, it only furthered my belief that women keep the world going around, and our bodies truly are temples. Without us, life as we know it would not exist, so respect is crucial. Thank you, Eve Ensler, for helping me realize this.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Vaginas- The Meaning Behind the Performance
1)The genre of this piece of literature is drama, meaning that Ensler wrote these monologues to be performed. Why do you think she wants vaginas to be publicly performed? Why does she want vaginas to be physically embodied? What effect does this have on the way we see and think of vaginas?
Who would ever in their right mind want to perform a monologue on the most intimate part of a woman's body: the vagina? At first, I was skeptical about it, in wondrance as to who could ever embody a character and talk about such an intimate, pleasing, and embarassing topic? I do think there is a true reason as to why she wants "vaginas" to be publicly performed.
In the introduction, author Gloria Steinem writes that "when you rape, beat, maim, mutilate, burn, bury, and terrorize women, you destroy the essential life energy on the planet. You force what is meant to be open, trusting, nurturing, creative, and alive to be bent, infertile, and broken." I have never looked at women as being so powerful before, maybe because I always assumed certain duties and thought of myself as less powerful (physically) as opposed to my male counterparts. What I realize now is that women are the sole creators of life, and with utilzing their body parts, the vagina, it expands the population and helps the world grow into a more culture universe. By beating, raping, or physically abusing a women, it can only lessen that significant and kindly power God has bestowed upon them. If women become "infertile" and "broken," how else will the world expand? I think by publicly performing TVM is to help others, men AND women, about the awareness as to what is going on in the world today and how we can help women in less fortunate countries. Steinem also mentions in the intro that "all the productions raise money and consciousness for local groups that work to stop violence toward women," which I believe is Ensler's real goal.
Physical embodiment is also something heavily braced in TVM. I feel Ensler wants women to brace their "hoo-has" and physically embody them because it is a form of being, it's something so personal that co-exists inside of us, and can be quite powerful. For example, on page 48, one woman explains the terrifying experience of finding her clitoris at a vagina workshop. She says, " This clitoris finding....real, too real. I could feel the panic coming. The simultaneous terror and realization that I had avoided finding my clitoris...I was, in fact, terrified I did not have a clitoris." For me to read this, I was baffled. How could a women whom I'm sure has had so much more experience and years on me not know she possesses the one part of a woman's body that serves no purpose but to serve as pleasure? Does she not understand the capabilities her body has? Does she not want to be in touch with her body, or feel the power for herself and let someone else "take care" of it? Later on, she mentions her teacher helping her. On page 49, Ensler writes, "She told me my clitoris was not something I could lose. It was me, the essence of me. I didn't have to find it. I had to be it. Be my clitoris." Reading that, I was confused thinking, how in the WORLD can a person be a body part?! For how passionate I am, I don't think I could ever BE my clitoris. The way I interpreted it, the woman finally became one with herself and comfortable enough to experiment, something I think all girls should do, so they know how to take care, please, and stay away from what they don't like. It's important to be in touch with oneself to the fullest! On page 50, the woman says, " Then the quivering became a quake, an eruption... broke open into an ancient horizon of light and silence... I felt connection, calling connection as I lay there thrashing about on my little blue mat." The woman finally physically embodied herself and became one with her body, which allowed her to possess power and the right to cause herself a world of pleasure and her very first self-inducing orgasm. I definitely think that this affects the way we see the vagina wholeheartedly. By reading these other women's points of views and hearing the positive feedback they have received and the way they can view their vaginas is a beautiful thing. It definitely makes me view the vagina differently; it is a part of our being and something we should not be afraid of. It is the "essence" of us, the only intimate private part of women that we embody. It possesses power, we can pro-create and do not need someone to give us pleasure. The vagina is a powerful and beautiful thing... one that we all should embrace.
Who would ever in their right mind want to perform a monologue on the most intimate part of a woman's body: the vagina? At first, I was skeptical about it, in wondrance as to who could ever embody a character and talk about such an intimate, pleasing, and embarassing topic? I do think there is a true reason as to why she wants "vaginas" to be publicly performed.
In the introduction, author Gloria Steinem writes that "when you rape, beat, maim, mutilate, burn, bury, and terrorize women, you destroy the essential life energy on the planet. You force what is meant to be open, trusting, nurturing, creative, and alive to be bent, infertile, and broken." I have never looked at women as being so powerful before, maybe because I always assumed certain duties and thought of myself as less powerful (physically) as opposed to my male counterparts. What I realize now is that women are the sole creators of life, and with utilzing their body parts, the vagina, it expands the population and helps the world grow into a more culture universe. By beating, raping, or physically abusing a women, it can only lessen that significant and kindly power God has bestowed upon them. If women become "infertile" and "broken," how else will the world expand? I think by publicly performing TVM is to help others, men AND women, about the awareness as to what is going on in the world today and how we can help women in less fortunate countries. Steinem also mentions in the intro that "all the productions raise money and consciousness for local groups that work to stop violence toward women," which I believe is Ensler's real goal.
Physical embodiment is also something heavily braced in TVM. I feel Ensler wants women to brace their "hoo-has" and physically embody them because it is a form of being, it's something so personal that co-exists inside of us, and can be quite powerful. For example, on page 48, one woman explains the terrifying experience of finding her clitoris at a vagina workshop. She says, " This clitoris finding....real, too real. I could feel the panic coming. The simultaneous terror and realization that I had avoided finding my clitoris...I was, in fact, terrified I did not have a clitoris." For me to read this, I was baffled. How could a women whom I'm sure has had so much more experience and years on me not know she possesses the one part of a woman's body that serves no purpose but to serve as pleasure? Does she not understand the capabilities her body has? Does she not want to be in touch with her body, or feel the power for herself and let someone else "take care" of it? Later on, she mentions her teacher helping her. On page 49, Ensler writes, "She told me my clitoris was not something I could lose. It was me, the essence of me. I didn't have to find it. I had to be it. Be my clitoris." Reading that, I was confused thinking, how in the WORLD can a person be a body part?! For how passionate I am, I don't think I could ever BE my clitoris. The way I interpreted it, the woman finally became one with herself and comfortable enough to experiment, something I think all girls should do, so they know how to take care, please, and stay away from what they don't like. It's important to be in touch with oneself to the fullest! On page 50, the woman says, " Then the quivering became a quake, an eruption... broke open into an ancient horizon of light and silence... I felt connection, calling connection as I lay there thrashing about on my little blue mat." The woman finally physically embodied herself and became one with her body, which allowed her to possess power and the right to cause herself a world of pleasure and her very first self-inducing orgasm. I definitely think that this affects the way we see the vagina wholeheartedly. By reading these other women's points of views and hearing the positive feedback they have received and the way they can view their vaginas is a beautiful thing. It definitely makes me view the vagina differently; it is a part of our being and something we should not be afraid of. It is the "essence" of us, the only intimate private part of women that we embody. It possesses power, we can pro-create and do not need someone to give us pleasure. The vagina is a powerful and beautiful thing... one that we all should embrace.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
The Crucial name of "Down There"- The Vagina
2)For Ensler, language is important? Why? What does it matter what we call body parts? What is the importance of language in defining sexuality, bodies, etc.? Why do you think she asks those questions about what vaginas would wear, etc? What is she trying to do with that?
While I have just started reading The Vagina Monologues by Eve Ensler, I am completely hooked. In order to begin, I have to say the book isn't what I thought it would be. While I envisioned "girl power" and funny stories, I did not picture it to be a move of femininism towards stopping violence against women (rape, sexual harrassment, abuse, etc.)
While I personally always felt violated in a verbal way having my body parts being called crass words (like cunt, for example,) but it made me think differently because of Ensler. I think the reason that language is so important to Ensler is because in some ways, it defines who we are. One perfect example of a woman who was not familiar with language was Gloria Steinem, who wrote the introduction to TVM. On the 1st page, she writes, "I come from the "down there" generation." When I first read this, I thought to myself, what is a "down there?!" As she continues, she explains that women in her family never used these words, and on the 2nd page, Steinem mentions that she "never once heard the word clitoris." She also goes on to say one page 3 that this left her "unprotected against the shaming words and dirty jokes of the school yard... men... knew more about women's bodies than women did."
I think during that time in society, it was unheard of for women to use words like that. The art of sex and words to describe such intimate and personal body parts were something appalling, because women were expected to be wholesome and innocent. Men, on the other hand, were supposed to have knowledge of matters of sex and body parts. It was considered non-masculine if one didn't. That's what Steinem means when she says men know more about women's body parts than women themselves.
Alas, this got me thinking. Is this why men are known for abusing women? Is this why women get raped? Is this the reason why women ALLOW themselves to be put in this situation? In some twisted way, it got me thinking that maybe because men have always been "one step ahead" in terms of the details of the anatomy and sex? Maybe they feel they have a power over us... and because women were never comfortable or in knowledge of the terms themselves they don't exactly know how to handle the situation, much less know what they are doing. I think this is why Ensler stresses how important language is in terms of the vagina; it is an identification of oneself, and their body parts, in my opinion the most sacred and personal part of the body. How else can we defend ourselves if we are not in touch with ourselves?
Ensler also stresses the importance of expression of sexuality concerning language. As part of the intro, Steinem discusses vaginal occurrences. For example, Steinem writes, "Glenn Close gets 2,500 people to stand and chant the word cunt." Steinem also mentions how there si a Cunt Workshop at Wesleyan University. Now when I first read this, it was mind-boggling to me. What is so important about a word I grew up feeling was degrading? I realized the word has more than just one meaning. The word Close chose to chant represents empowerment, feminisim, and also being in touch with your body. Now women may ask, how does this help prevent violence? To begin, it signifies a unity of women, men, and whomever else involved the empowerment of the female genitalia, and how it is a powerful thing. Steinem makes an interesting point. Women are what keeps the world continuing. They are the ones that produce children to then grow and produce more. By beating, raping, and abusing them does not help the matter, but lowers the degree of possible reproduction. Steinem writes, "In order for the human race to continue, women must be safe and empowered." This is very true. By embracing the language of the vagina and for what it is, one is also embracing the power and identity it has. Wtihout vaginas, the world would not exist so highly as it does today.
On a comical level, I think Ensler pushes the use of language because it is funny. On page 5, she writes, " Vagina. Doesn't matter how many times you say it, it never sounds like a word you wanna say." I thought about that, and it's very true. I even feel uncomfortable using the word in everyday conversation! I think by using interesting words (like "pussycat" in Great Neck where Ensler researched) and other words like "pajama" or "split knish," it creats something fun, allows the women to be creative and intimate with her body as well as truly OWN her body. By doing this, she creates an identity and a power to herself. Same goes for why Ensler questions what vaginas would wear. She is essentially helping women to create an identity and realize how sacred their bodies are, therefore keeping them strong and preventing them from being in violent situations.
While I have just started reading The Vagina Monologues by Eve Ensler, I am completely hooked. In order to begin, I have to say the book isn't what I thought it would be. While I envisioned "girl power" and funny stories, I did not picture it to be a move of femininism towards stopping violence against women (rape, sexual harrassment, abuse, etc.)
While I personally always felt violated in a verbal way having my body parts being called crass words (like cunt, for example,) but it made me think differently because of Ensler. I think the reason that language is so important to Ensler is because in some ways, it defines who we are. One perfect example of a woman who was not familiar with language was Gloria Steinem, who wrote the introduction to TVM. On the 1st page, she writes, "I come from the "down there" generation." When I first read this, I thought to myself, what is a "down there?!" As she continues, she explains that women in her family never used these words, and on the 2nd page, Steinem mentions that she "never once heard the word clitoris." She also goes on to say one page 3 that this left her "unprotected against the shaming words and dirty jokes of the school yard... men... knew more about women's bodies than women did."
I think during that time in society, it was unheard of for women to use words like that. The art of sex and words to describe such intimate and personal body parts were something appalling, because women were expected to be wholesome and innocent. Men, on the other hand, were supposed to have knowledge of matters of sex and body parts. It was considered non-masculine if one didn't. That's what Steinem means when she says men know more about women's body parts than women themselves.
Alas, this got me thinking. Is this why men are known for abusing women? Is this why women get raped? Is this the reason why women ALLOW themselves to be put in this situation? In some twisted way, it got me thinking that maybe because men have always been "one step ahead" in terms of the details of the anatomy and sex? Maybe they feel they have a power over us... and because women were never comfortable or in knowledge of the terms themselves they don't exactly know how to handle the situation, much less know what they are doing. I think this is why Ensler stresses how important language is in terms of the vagina; it is an identification of oneself, and their body parts, in my opinion the most sacred and personal part of the body. How else can we defend ourselves if we are not in touch with ourselves?
Ensler also stresses the importance of expression of sexuality concerning language. As part of the intro, Steinem discusses vaginal occurrences. For example, Steinem writes, "Glenn Close gets 2,500 people to stand and chant the word cunt." Steinem also mentions how there si a Cunt Workshop at Wesleyan University. Now when I first read this, it was mind-boggling to me. What is so important about a word I grew up feeling was degrading? I realized the word has more than just one meaning. The word Close chose to chant represents empowerment, feminisim, and also being in touch with your body. Now women may ask, how does this help prevent violence? To begin, it signifies a unity of women, men, and whomever else involved the empowerment of the female genitalia, and how it is a powerful thing. Steinem makes an interesting point. Women are what keeps the world continuing. They are the ones that produce children to then grow and produce more. By beating, raping, and abusing them does not help the matter, but lowers the degree of possible reproduction. Steinem writes, "In order for the human race to continue, women must be safe and empowered." This is very true. By embracing the language of the vagina and for what it is, one is also embracing the power and identity it has. Wtihout vaginas, the world would not exist so highly as it does today.
On a comical level, I think Ensler pushes the use of language because it is funny. On page 5, she writes, " Vagina. Doesn't matter how many times you say it, it never sounds like a word you wanna say." I thought about that, and it's very true. I even feel uncomfortable using the word in everyday conversation! I think by using interesting words (like "pussycat" in Great Neck where Ensler researched) and other words like "pajama" or "split knish," it creats something fun, allows the women to be creative and intimate with her body as well as truly OWN her body. By doing this, she creates an identity and a power to herself. Same goes for why Ensler questions what vaginas would wear. She is essentially helping women to create an identity and realize how sacred their bodies are, therefore keeping them strong and preventing them from being in violent situations.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Krik? Krak!'s Epilogue Analysis
While I was reading the end of Krik? Krak! by Edwidge Danticat, I got confused. But as I was reading the epilogue, I really started to understand. The stories given in Krik? Krak! come full circle, which I think is one reason I loved the book so much.
The epilogue is entitled "Women Like Us." This immediately intrigued me because I am a woman, and wanted to read what Danticat wrote about the gender and mystery of women.
Danticat touches upon the fact in her Haitian culture, it is not seen for women to be writers. Women that are known to cook and write are called "kitchen poets." Danticat writes on page 220 that "when you write, it's like braiding your hair. Taking a handful of coarse unruly strands and attempting to bring them unity. Like the diverse women in your family. Those whose fables and metaphors, whose similes, and soliloquies, whose diction and je ne sais quoi daily slip into your survival soup, by way of their fingers." I love the way Danticat relates bringing peices of hair together in a sense of unity and compares them to bringing all of the women's stories together, good or bad, magical or insane, romantic or cold, together in one. That was something I found truly beautiful to me because it reminded me of my own family.
My family is filled with beautiful, strong, and interesting women who have all gone down different paths in life but have remained rooted to my family and have lived to share their tales as means of communication and advice towards others, like myself. That quote really connected to my life, the women I look up the most to (my mom, my cousin, and my aunt) and how their words of wisdom have guided me into my future.
Danticat also relates writing in the present day as a way of telling someone else, regardless of who it is, your story and the stories of other inspirational figures that have guided you. On page 222, Danticat writes, "These women, they asked for your voice so that they could tell your mother in your place that yes, women like you do speak, even if they speak in a tongue that is hard to understand." I found this so effective because it's true. Even though it was once seen as immoral and not write for a woman to voice her opinions, thoughts, and dreams on something as informal as white lined paper, it is a means of living to tell others, regardless of gender, your path in life and your story as well as your women ancestors that came before you. When she says, "these women asked for your voice," what she means is that women were never allowed to write in the olden days. Now, women can voice their opinions and openly tell others their secrets. The women from the past are asking for a way to get their visions and stories out in order to inspire others. By a present relative or friend doing so, she lives to tell all. The present day woman can relate to people today in a way that others could not back then. This is something truly beautiful. She also says on page 222 that "the women in your family have never lost touch with one another." Regardless of who passes or not, signals of women ancestors are always around, guiding you towards your future, especially by their past stories. I definitely feel that was the main theme Danticat wanted to get across here. As Danticat puts it on page 224, "This was your testament to the way that these women lived and died and lived again." Through writing like Danticat did, she was able to unify all different stories from perhaps women from her past and present Haiti together in one to create a truly powerful and beautiful story.
The epilogue is entitled "Women Like Us." This immediately intrigued me because I am a woman, and wanted to read what Danticat wrote about the gender and mystery of women.
Danticat touches upon the fact in her Haitian culture, it is not seen for women to be writers. Women that are known to cook and write are called "kitchen poets." Danticat writes on page 220 that "when you write, it's like braiding your hair. Taking a handful of coarse unruly strands and attempting to bring them unity. Like the diverse women in your family. Those whose fables and metaphors, whose similes, and soliloquies, whose diction and je ne sais quoi daily slip into your survival soup, by way of their fingers." I love the way Danticat relates bringing peices of hair together in a sense of unity and compares them to bringing all of the women's stories together, good or bad, magical or insane, romantic or cold, together in one. That was something I found truly beautiful to me because it reminded me of my own family.
My family is filled with beautiful, strong, and interesting women who have all gone down different paths in life but have remained rooted to my family and have lived to share their tales as means of communication and advice towards others, like myself. That quote really connected to my life, the women I look up the most to (my mom, my cousin, and my aunt) and how their words of wisdom have guided me into my future.
Danticat also relates writing in the present day as a way of telling someone else, regardless of who it is, your story and the stories of other inspirational figures that have guided you. On page 222, Danticat writes, "These women, they asked for your voice so that they could tell your mother in your place that yes, women like you do speak, even if they speak in a tongue that is hard to understand." I found this so effective because it's true. Even though it was once seen as immoral and not write for a woman to voice her opinions, thoughts, and dreams on something as informal as white lined paper, it is a means of living to tell others, regardless of gender, your path in life and your story as well as your women ancestors that came before you. When she says, "these women asked for your voice," what she means is that women were never allowed to write in the olden days. Now, women can voice their opinions and openly tell others their secrets. The women from the past are asking for a way to get their visions and stories out in order to inspire others. By a present relative or friend doing so, she lives to tell all. The present day woman can relate to people today in a way that others could not back then. This is something truly beautiful. She also says on page 222 that "the women in your family have never lost touch with one another." Regardless of who passes or not, signals of women ancestors are always around, guiding you towards your future, especially by their past stories. I definitely feel that was the main theme Danticat wanted to get across here. As Danticat puts it on page 224, "This was your testament to the way that these women lived and died and lived again." Through writing like Danticat did, she was able to unify all different stories from perhaps women from her past and present Haiti together in one to create a truly powerful and beautiful story.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
A Touching Thought- Krik? Krak! by Edwidge Danticat
In order to begin, let me start by saying that I am deeply touched by reading Krik? Krak! by Edwidge Danticat. I never realized how easy and how priviledged my life was here in America until I got a better glimpse of life in Haiti. The part I'm going to blog about that REALLY touched me emotionally is from chapter 2 entitled Nineteen Thirty Seven.
Throughout this chapter, the narrator (a young woman, I'm assuming now) visits her mother, a woman whom she was incredibly close to growing up, in prison. Her mother, named Manman, was arrested because she was accused of killing a neighbor's child she helped look after. Throughout the course of the chapter, the narrator re-tells her story of the remaining time she spent with her mother.
On page 46, Danticat introduces a strange woman who appeared at the narrator's door one night. Jacqueline, her name is, further on explains to the narrator that she knows her through the river, a blessed place where a united group of women go and mourn/rejoice the lives of their late mothers. Danticat writes, " Sister, I do not want to tell you this, but your mother is dead. Her blood calls to me from the ground. Let us go see her." The way Jacqueline says that, so matter-of-factly as if it's nothing, is something that strikes me as funny. How can a person tell their friend that their mother is dead? It made me contemplate about how different our clutures are here... if this were in America, it would take time for the friend to even utter the words to the one losing her mother.
On the contrary, it is ironic to how deep her friend, Jacqueline, can get. She says to her, "her blood calls to me from the ground." Now let's Americanize that a little. The reader can wonder, what does this even mean?! This can come off as being very religious, like an Upper Power is telling her this. What I took this statement as is this: "My intuition is telling me bad fortune is to come. We must go and seek the truth."
The part that REALLY got to me was on page 48. They are finally at the prison cell, awaiting the burning ceremony of the narrator's mother. Danticat writes, "She then gave me the pillow, my mother's pillow. I hugged the pillow against my chest, feeling some of the hair rising in clouds of dark dust into my nostrils." To me, that is so personal and vulnerable. I see this as the narrator's inner feelings coming out. She clutches the pillow like a little girl, afraid of the dark at night, and to me, she is holding on to the last peice she has of her mother. The way Danticat describes the hair in the pillow is both disturbing and touching. While it's disturbing to think of something like her mother's hair that she was forced to shave off fall out of a pillow like told secrets, it's touching, as well .It describes the remnants of her mom, the last remaining tangible parts.
It really made me re-evaluate my own relationship with my mom. There are days when I just WISH I was on my own, and days our fights are tumultuous and out of control. We say things we don't mean, and are downright cruel to one another. But at least I have that option. Reading these specific parts of the chapter really made my chest feel heavy and made me extremely worried about my mom. What would I do if I lost her? I give the narrator a lot of credit, because she really held it together and remained strong through it all. If that were me, I'd be hysterical in tears, not knowing where to put myself. I think because our cultures are so different, the narrator was taught to be strong and that's why she did not show emotion. She held it in the inside.
This section REALLY affected me, and anyone who is close to their mother can understand why. In this moment, it made me think... how would I handle this, which I think Danticat wanted to make her readers ponder.
Throughout this chapter, the narrator (a young woman, I'm assuming now) visits her mother, a woman whom she was incredibly close to growing up, in prison. Her mother, named Manman, was arrested because she was accused of killing a neighbor's child she helped look after. Throughout the course of the chapter, the narrator re-tells her story of the remaining time she spent with her mother.
On page 46, Danticat introduces a strange woman who appeared at the narrator's door one night. Jacqueline, her name is, further on explains to the narrator that she knows her through the river, a blessed place where a united group of women go and mourn/rejoice the lives of their late mothers. Danticat writes, " Sister, I do not want to tell you this, but your mother is dead. Her blood calls to me from the ground. Let us go see her." The way Jacqueline says that, so matter-of-factly as if it's nothing, is something that strikes me as funny. How can a person tell their friend that their mother is dead? It made me contemplate about how different our clutures are here... if this were in America, it would take time for the friend to even utter the words to the one losing her mother.
On the contrary, it is ironic to how deep her friend, Jacqueline, can get. She says to her, "her blood calls to me from the ground." Now let's Americanize that a little. The reader can wonder, what does this even mean?! This can come off as being very religious, like an Upper Power is telling her this. What I took this statement as is this: "My intuition is telling me bad fortune is to come. We must go and seek the truth."
The part that REALLY got to me was on page 48. They are finally at the prison cell, awaiting the burning ceremony of the narrator's mother. Danticat writes, "She then gave me the pillow, my mother's pillow. I hugged the pillow against my chest, feeling some of the hair rising in clouds of dark dust into my nostrils." To me, that is so personal and vulnerable. I see this as the narrator's inner feelings coming out. She clutches the pillow like a little girl, afraid of the dark at night, and to me, she is holding on to the last peice she has of her mother. The way Danticat describes the hair in the pillow is both disturbing and touching. While it's disturbing to think of something like her mother's hair that she was forced to shave off fall out of a pillow like told secrets, it's touching, as well .It describes the remnants of her mom, the last remaining tangible parts.
It really made me re-evaluate my own relationship with my mom. There are days when I just WISH I was on my own, and days our fights are tumultuous and out of control. We say things we don't mean, and are downright cruel to one another. But at least I have that option. Reading these specific parts of the chapter really made my chest feel heavy and made me extremely worried about my mom. What would I do if I lost her? I give the narrator a lot of credit, because she really held it together and remained strong through it all. If that were me, I'd be hysterical in tears, not knowing where to put myself. I think because our cultures are so different, the narrator was taught to be strong and that's why she did not show emotion. She held it in the inside.
This section REALLY affected me, and anyone who is close to their mother can understand why. In this moment, it made me think... how would I handle this, which I think Danticat wanted to make her readers ponder.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Literary Analysis- Different Ways to Pray-Naomi Shihab Nye
A poem that really struck home for me was "Different Ways to Pray" by Naomi Shihab Nye. What I liked about this poem was that it touched upon all different people, and how praying for people mean different things based upon the genders and age groups she touched upon.
On page 3, Nye writes, "There was the method of kneeling...Women dreamed wistfully of hidden corners where knee fit rock." I understood what Nye was describing; I could picture myself kneeling by my bed at night as a little girl praying for whatever it was my small mind was concerned or worried about. What I realized from this poem is that women are very personal in the way that they pray, and are very vulnerable. In my opinion, for women, praying can be a private way to ask God for help, or looking for a companion to talk to that my being a woman I can strongly identify with.
Nye also discusses the way men pray. Also on page 3, Nye writes, " There were men who had been shepherds so long... Under the olive tress, they raised their arms- Hear us! We have pain on earth! We have so much pain there is no place to store it!" Based on this reading, I thought to myself that praying really can be done in different ways for different people. It came across to me that men pray when they feel that they need help. The men that she discusses try to solve and ease their "pain" on their own. It came across to me that when there was nothing left, the shepherds would then turn (to God to ask for help when there were no other options. It made me realize there are different levels that people can go through until they feel it is time to turn to the Higher Power.
What was something I thought was funny (being a devout Catholic) was how Nye brought children into the poem. On page 5, Nye writes, "There were those who didn't care about praying. They told the old ones, you are wasting your time." I can relate to that because in today's society, I often find children and teens questioning a higher power. Is there really a higher power? How can anyone tell? In today's generation, with all of the technology and books and information on different types of religion, and High Powers, how can anyone tell what is believable and what isn't? Nye then goes on to write, "The old ones prayed for Allah to mend their brains." What Nye is doing is uniting different generations: old and new. The older generation lived in the time period where religion was a big aspect of life, especially in Nye's culture. The old generation hopes that the younger ones will start to believe in a Higher Power and put their faith in God when older.
The title of this poem is very self-explanatory. Throughout analyzing the poem, I realized men, women, and children have different beliefs and different ways to pray.
On page 3, Nye writes, "There was the method of kneeling...Women dreamed wistfully of hidden corners where knee fit rock." I understood what Nye was describing; I could picture myself kneeling by my bed at night as a little girl praying for whatever it was my small mind was concerned or worried about. What I realized from this poem is that women are very personal in the way that they pray, and are very vulnerable. In my opinion, for women, praying can be a private way to ask God for help, or looking for a companion to talk to that my being a woman I can strongly identify with.
Nye also discusses the way men pray. Also on page 3, Nye writes, " There were men who had been shepherds so long... Under the olive tress, they raised their arms- Hear us! We have pain on earth! We have so much pain there is no place to store it!" Based on this reading, I thought to myself that praying really can be done in different ways for different people. It came across to me that men pray when they feel that they need help. The men that she discusses try to solve and ease their "pain" on their own. It came across to me that when there was nothing left, the shepherds would then turn (to God to ask for help when there were no other options. It made me realize there are different levels that people can go through until they feel it is time to turn to the Higher Power.
What was something I thought was funny (being a devout Catholic) was how Nye brought children into the poem. On page 5, Nye writes, "There were those who didn't care about praying. They told the old ones, you are wasting your time." I can relate to that because in today's society, I often find children and teens questioning a higher power. Is there really a higher power? How can anyone tell? In today's generation, with all of the technology and books and information on different types of religion, and High Powers, how can anyone tell what is believable and what isn't? Nye then goes on to write, "The old ones prayed for Allah to mend their brains." What Nye is doing is uniting different generations: old and new. The older generation lived in the time period where religion was a big aspect of life, especially in Nye's culture. The old generation hopes that the younger ones will start to believe in a Higher Power and put their faith in God when older.
The title of this poem is very self-explanatory. Throughout analyzing the poem, I realized men, women, and children have different beliefs and different ways to pray.
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